My journey started with running, so the only thing that made sense was to finish my journey with running. I retraced the steps that I knew so well two years ago at the Virginia training center. The path and the track I always set out before myself to finish. Running 5-6 times a week had become normal those two years ago before my course changed. And I had to do it again. Despite my surgery a little over a month ago, I once again had something to prove. I had returned for debriefing, and this was my chance.
I slipped away, past the barn and past the gate. Then I ran. I located a mailbox as my goal to make it to, steadied my breath, and made a decision to finish strong. I smiled and reflected about the many times I had done this same run. The times before the Lord decided to break my body for his glory. And the time I even ran in Spain before my recent surgery.
You may think I'm crazy to have done this, but I had no choice. I smiled with joy, teared up as I reflected on the many times I ran without knowing why. The encounters I had with God. The people I had prayed for who at one time had no name or face, but now my mind regularly sees their faces while their names are on my lips in prayer. My legs resisted a lot less than I thought they would being freshly rewounded. Amazingly enough, it seems as though my surgery for the removal of the metal was the right choice. I laughed because I could tell I would run more in the future.
I thought of the people I began my journey with. The ones I came to deeply love. The ones I met along the way. And the ones I wished I could hug again and tell them how special they are. I counted my steps back as I had finished my run. I had run 341 steps (walking steps that is). I praised the Lord and knew without him none of the pain and heartache of the past two years would have been worth it.
I saw the entire story this time. One that began with a girl wanting to tell the world about Christ, and one that ends with a girl who was blessed to do just that. All the bumps in the road are weaved in between. The many lessons that I have learned along the way.
I decided to finish this one strong. The way the Bible tells us to. The beginning and middle are not mentioned, so there's something significant about the end. The end is when you are tired. Finished. Often times fed up. Which is all the more reason to run. It was so much more than a physical run. It projected clearly the way I was made as a daughter of the heavenly Father. He has made me his warrior and citizen of the kingdom of God. The person who wants to stand at the gates of hell telling people of his love before they step through. And the woman who at the end of the race can say, the suffering was worth it and fades in comparison to knowing the King of kings and Lord of lords.
Thank you Lord for letting me physically run today and for letting me finish the race that we started two years ago. You are faithful.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Under the Knife... Again
My fears came true. I knew it was coming. I resisted. I hoped it wouldn't happen. I had cried over the prospect of this. But it all came down to the fact that I need more surgery to help with the swelling, pain, and discomfort I still face. You see, I still have these big ole metal rods and screws in my legs. This metal that once stabilized my very broken legs are no longer needed, and could actually be the source of the problems I still face. Some of the problems I still face are just a new reality for me.
We made the appointment for surgery. Mom and I got in the car and she turned to me asking how I was feeling. I had a decision to make. I could freak out. I could cry. I could throw a really great tantrum. But none of those things would help. I would have runny mascara, a red face, a flustered heart, and at the end of it all still be right where I started. So instead, I chose the peace of God that he so generously offers us. His peace that covers me in those moments of frustration and fear. I also told my mom that I'd be okay if she could get me to Sonic's happy hour for a diet vanilla coke. I think Sonic happy hour is God's gift to coke addicts who love great ice and flavour add ins.
Pray for me as I continue to face some of my fears with this entire ordeal: using a walker again, losing some of the progress I've made in the past two years, pain, and boredom as I heal.
My God is a big God, and nothing is too small for him. His love is constantly lavished on me. How blessed am I to have the medical care that I need? How blessed am I by a family who is right by my side and supports me every step of the way? Who am I to complain? Who am I to question God? We walk by faith and not by sight and surgeries and health concerns are no different. So I'm choosing the path that God sets out before me. I'm choosing to fall into his loving arms. He'll be there to catch me and comfort me. Thanks for your prayers. Thanks for walking alongside me continuously.
My surgery will be in a week, November 3 in the morning. I plan on healing quickly and being on my way in life :) We'll see what the Lord has in store.
In Him,
Taryn
We made the appointment for surgery. Mom and I got in the car and she turned to me asking how I was feeling. I had a decision to make. I could freak out. I could cry. I could throw a really great tantrum. But none of those things would help. I would have runny mascara, a red face, a flustered heart, and at the end of it all still be right where I started. So instead, I chose the peace of God that he so generously offers us. His peace that covers me in those moments of frustration and fear. I also told my mom that I'd be okay if she could get me to Sonic's happy hour for a diet vanilla coke. I think Sonic happy hour is God's gift to coke addicts who love great ice and flavour add ins.
Pray for me as I continue to face some of my fears with this entire ordeal: using a walker again, losing some of the progress I've made in the past two years, pain, and boredom as I heal.
My God is a big God, and nothing is too small for him. His love is constantly lavished on me. How blessed am I to have the medical care that I need? How blessed am I by a family who is right by my side and supports me every step of the way? Who am I to complain? Who am I to question God? We walk by faith and not by sight and surgeries and health concerns are no different. So I'm choosing the path that God sets out before me. I'm choosing to fall into his loving arms. He'll be there to catch me and comfort me. Thanks for your prayers. Thanks for walking alongside me continuously.
My surgery will be in a week, November 3 in the morning. I plan on healing quickly and being on my way in life :) We'll see what the Lord has in store.
In Him,
Taryn
Saturday, October 8, 2011
September/October Update
Home is Where the Heart is
My trip to France went well, and I cannot believe that it has come and gone. My last few months of my term have flown by, and the time has come to return home.
I have been reflecting a lot over my last 2 years. I do not think there are words to adequately encompass the magnitude of what I have seen and experienced. I have walked through fire and found that I was not alone, but God was with me. I have questioned my faith only to find it stronger and more refined. My character has changed and I stay up at night reflecting and wondering what it is the Lord is teaching me. I have stood at the gates of hell beckoning those around me to know my Savior. Most importantly, I have fallen even more in love with my Creator.
Reflecting can be good. Reflecting can be difficult and sad. I am walking away from so much, and walking away knowing that I must trust God with the relationships I have made. I must trust him with the souls that I constantly intercede for. I know that once I’m back in the States he will bring others into my life that I will have the urge to share the truth with.
So I coming home. I coming home to many questions without answers. I coming home to a home that really isn’t my home anymore. Maybe it never was. You see, I have struggled with this concept of where I belong. Desiring a home. Desiring of place to feel settled. But the Lord has shown me something quite different from this concept. I am not of this world. I am an alien and stranger. How can one feel at home when they are not of the land they are in? My citizenship is of the Kingdom of God. No other citizenship can I truly claim.
So what they say is true. Home is where the heart is. And the Bible clearly tells me to not “lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
I know my treasure in Christ. My heart is with him. My citizenship is of his eternal kingdom. So until the day I see his face, I will feel restless. In the meantime I plan on making his name known. May we advance his kingdom. I can be okay knowing where my true home is as I return to my earthly home. For now.
Thank You
As I am wrapping things up, I cannot say thank you enough. Your encouragement from the beginning to the end have meant so much. I started out my journey excited and nervous, then I hit a rather large bump in the road (and a few more after that one) to finally returning home. Without your prayers I know I would have been lost. Without God’s guidance and love I would have forgotten in the midst of the craziness the true reason why I came to Spain.
Thank you for being prayer warriors for me and for allowing me to be a prayer warrior for you. As my time is over and this is my last newsletter, I would like to offer that if at anytime anyone needs prayer, please email me. I would love to continue to serve you in this way and act as the church is supposed to in “bearing one another’s burdens.”
Prayer reminds us that we are not alone. Thank you for being a part in teaching me this lesson.
I know this update is short, but I will be posting more on my blog (and already have) as I close things out. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
PRAYER REQUESTS
Transition home
any upcoming surgeries I may have
PRAISES
A blessed season of seeing God at work
Growth in my walk with the Lord
My trip to France went well, and I cannot believe that it has come and gone. My last few months of my term have flown by, and the time has come to return home.
I have been reflecting a lot over my last 2 years. I do not think there are words to adequately encompass the magnitude of what I have seen and experienced. I have walked through fire and found that I was not alone, but God was with me. I have questioned my faith only to find it stronger and more refined. My character has changed and I stay up at night reflecting and wondering what it is the Lord is teaching me. I have stood at the gates of hell beckoning those around me to know my Savior. Most importantly, I have fallen even more in love with my Creator.
Reflecting can be good. Reflecting can be difficult and sad. I am walking away from so much, and walking away knowing that I must trust God with the relationships I have made. I must trust him with the souls that I constantly intercede for. I know that once I’m back in the States he will bring others into my life that I will have the urge to share the truth with.
So I coming home. I coming home to many questions without answers. I coming home to a home that really isn’t my home anymore. Maybe it never was. You see, I have struggled with this concept of where I belong. Desiring a home. Desiring of place to feel settled. But the Lord has shown me something quite different from this concept. I am not of this world. I am an alien and stranger. How can one feel at home when they are not of the land they are in? My citizenship is of the Kingdom of God. No other citizenship can I truly claim.
So what they say is true. Home is where the heart is. And the Bible clearly tells me to not “lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
I know my treasure in Christ. My heart is with him. My citizenship is of his eternal kingdom. So until the day I see his face, I will feel restless. In the meantime I plan on making his name known. May we advance his kingdom. I can be okay knowing where my true home is as I return to my earthly home. For now.
Thank You
As I am wrapping things up, I cannot say thank you enough. Your encouragement from the beginning to the end have meant so much. I started out my journey excited and nervous, then I hit a rather large bump in the road (and a few more after that one) to finally returning home. Without your prayers I know I would have been lost. Without God’s guidance and love I would have forgotten in the midst of the craziness the true reason why I came to Spain.
Thank you for being prayer warriors for me and for allowing me to be a prayer warrior for you. As my time is over and this is my last newsletter, I would like to offer that if at anytime anyone needs prayer, please email me. I would love to continue to serve you in this way and act as the church is supposed to in “bearing one another’s burdens.”
Prayer reminds us that we are not alone. Thank you for being a part in teaching me this lesson.
I know this update is short, but I will be posting more on my blog (and already have) as I close things out. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
PRAYER REQUESTS
Transition home
any upcoming surgeries I may have
PRAISES
A blessed season of seeing God at work
Growth in my walk with the Lord
Sunday, October 2, 2011
The Normal I Leave Behind
As my time is winding down in Spain it is interesting to think about the things that were once new and strange to me. Many of these things are part of my day to day life now, and as I head home it’s funny to think they are my new normal that I’ll be leaving in a few weeks. Some of these things are funny and others break my heart. Some of these things are little and others are big.
•on the way to therapy there is a man who is always on crutches who has a flower shop- he sits and studies music and makes the most beautiful sounds with his guitar. I always take out my head phones to listen. I pray for his injuries and that he finds comfort in my Christ.
•You greet to kiss one another. First to the left then to the right. One day I was in the elevator with a guy my age and introduced myself. He leaned forward for a kiss. I got nervous until I realized that since we had formally met, we greet one another with a kiss. I’m used to it now.
•Small elevators-please imagine this considering the previous comment
•Smoking laws have been passed in Spain where you can no longer smoke in bars or restaurants. Before I would regularly come home reeking of smoke.
•There is a man that always begs on the street where I am. I will not give money to beggars, but I will buy food or a meal if they are hungry. I do not always do that, but I do always acknowledge them as a person and say hi. He knows I won’t give him money so he has resorted to just greeting me back every time we see one another.
•Our doorman, Gregorio, has a very strong accent and at times it is impossible to understand him. I keep a mental tally: Taryn vs. Gregorio of the times that I understand and the times I do not. I think I’m finally catching up to him.
•Seeing somewhat famous people at physical therapy (bullfighters, newscasters, actors) and having no idea who they are since I’m not Spanish.
•Bus #1 which goes right by my house is the best bus in all of Madrid. It gets me home, to therapy, and down to the city center.
•I’m pretty sure I can navigate any public transportation now… I’ve done so in at least 10 cities in the past 2 years
•When waiting at a bus stop Spaniards keep a mental note of who was there first. Then they get on the bus according to that order. They yell if you do not follow it.
•Knowing that the bakeries in Spain have desserts that look good. The taste isn’t so great.
•Spaniards wait for you to cross the street at crosswalks. If they don’t follow the rules it’s completely appropriate to throw your hands up in the air and act angry. Sometimes you don’t have to act at all. You really are mad!
•Introducing chocolate chip cookies to my therapists and them being amazed at how wonderful they are.
•Learning to make peanut butter because buying it is super expensive and I felt very accomplished in doing this.
•Finding fresh milk and swearing that I’d never go back to the boxed milk you get off the shelf. Gotta make daddy proud.
•Language blunders never cease to be the most inappropriate things you could say. I won’t go into further detail.
•Going to Pablo and Carmen’s Bible study each Friday night for the past year and being amazed at how God’s word has shaped and changed the lives of those there. He answers their prayers and they are lavished by his love despite their circumstances.
•Early mornings are non-existent in Spain. The sun comes up around 8 and goes down as late as 10 pm.
•Missing some big things back home (Darren and Jeannine’s engagement party, friends’ weddings) and realizing life goes on without you. And that’s okay because my life has gone on as well.
•Knowing that because I choose to live away my time with you all this side of heaven may be limited. But we’ll have an eternity to catch up.
•Begging God for the salvation of my friends here and for people back home.
•Cooking and baking more than I ever thought possible. And liking it.
•Eating while walking or on public transportation is not seen and is somewhat inappropriate. You should see the looks you get.
•If you have a birthday and invite everyone out to eat, it’s the birthday person’s treat to everyone else.
•Mondays are apparently the best day for washing windows. All stores have people out cleaning the store front.
•Churros con chocolate-You get a mug of thick chocolate and dip these thick donuts like pastries in it. Very Spanish.
•The button for flushing a toilet is not on the side. It is on the top.
•Spaniards are all about the lottery. A lottery ticket is a common Christmas gift among friends.
•Spaniards tell me I’m blond. And I argue regularly with people that I have brown eyes not green. This would never be a question in the States.
•You see prostitutes on the highways and there is one street in the middle of the city center where prostitutes openly line up to work. My heart breaks every time I see the emptiness in their eyes.
•Getting excited when you hear English.
•Having a local restaurant/café where everyone knows who you are.
•Light switches are different. They are flat buttons.
•Spaniards conserve energy. In the metro unless someone is on the escalator and sets off the sensors it stops running. Same thing with lights.
•Letting my clothes air dry because clothes dryers are not common.
•I have not driven in a year and a half. I hope I remember how to get gas.
•Separate checks do not exist in Europe… you are constantly owing somebody money and trying to piece together your money to pay for your meal, café, etc. It’s like a puzzle.
•I have seen this side of the world. I have found it beautiful and charming with its intricacies and secrets to unveil. Yet not even the sites I’ve seen or the places I’ve been can fill my heart and give me purpose like knowing Christ does.
So here I go home! I go home to find yet another new normal. I find that it's okay I'm having to do that.
Onward,
Taryn
•on the way to therapy there is a man who is always on crutches who has a flower shop- he sits and studies music and makes the most beautiful sounds with his guitar. I always take out my head phones to listen. I pray for his injuries and that he finds comfort in my Christ.
•You greet to kiss one another. First to the left then to the right. One day I was in the elevator with a guy my age and introduced myself. He leaned forward for a kiss. I got nervous until I realized that since we had formally met, we greet one another with a kiss. I’m used to it now.
•Small elevators-please imagine this considering the previous comment
•Smoking laws have been passed in Spain where you can no longer smoke in bars or restaurants. Before I would regularly come home reeking of smoke.
•There is a man that always begs on the street where I am. I will not give money to beggars, but I will buy food or a meal if they are hungry. I do not always do that, but I do always acknowledge them as a person and say hi. He knows I won’t give him money so he has resorted to just greeting me back every time we see one another.
•Our doorman, Gregorio, has a very strong accent and at times it is impossible to understand him. I keep a mental tally: Taryn vs. Gregorio of the times that I understand and the times I do not. I think I’m finally catching up to him.
•Seeing somewhat famous people at physical therapy (bullfighters, newscasters, actors) and having no idea who they are since I’m not Spanish.
•Bus #1 which goes right by my house is the best bus in all of Madrid. It gets me home, to therapy, and down to the city center.
•I’m pretty sure I can navigate any public transportation now… I’ve done so in at least 10 cities in the past 2 years
•When waiting at a bus stop Spaniards keep a mental note of who was there first. Then they get on the bus according to that order. They yell if you do not follow it.
•Knowing that the bakeries in Spain have desserts that look good. The taste isn’t so great.
•Spaniards wait for you to cross the street at crosswalks. If they don’t follow the rules it’s completely appropriate to throw your hands up in the air and act angry. Sometimes you don’t have to act at all. You really are mad!
•Introducing chocolate chip cookies to my therapists and them being amazed at how wonderful they are.
•Learning to make peanut butter because buying it is super expensive and I felt very accomplished in doing this.
•Finding fresh milk and swearing that I’d never go back to the boxed milk you get off the shelf. Gotta make daddy proud.
•Language blunders never cease to be the most inappropriate things you could say. I won’t go into further detail.
•Going to Pablo and Carmen’s Bible study each Friday night for the past year and being amazed at how God’s word has shaped and changed the lives of those there. He answers their prayers and they are lavished by his love despite their circumstances.
•Early mornings are non-existent in Spain. The sun comes up around 8 and goes down as late as 10 pm.
•Missing some big things back home (Darren and Jeannine’s engagement party, friends’ weddings) and realizing life goes on without you. And that’s okay because my life has gone on as well.
•Knowing that because I choose to live away my time with you all this side of heaven may be limited. But we’ll have an eternity to catch up.
•Begging God for the salvation of my friends here and for people back home.
•Cooking and baking more than I ever thought possible. And liking it.
•Eating while walking or on public transportation is not seen and is somewhat inappropriate. You should see the looks you get.
•If you have a birthday and invite everyone out to eat, it’s the birthday person’s treat to everyone else.
•Mondays are apparently the best day for washing windows. All stores have people out cleaning the store front.
•Churros con chocolate-You get a mug of thick chocolate and dip these thick donuts like pastries in it. Very Spanish.
•The button for flushing a toilet is not on the side. It is on the top.
•Spaniards are all about the lottery. A lottery ticket is a common Christmas gift among friends.
•Spaniards tell me I’m blond. And I argue regularly with people that I have brown eyes not green. This would never be a question in the States.
•You see prostitutes on the highways and there is one street in the middle of the city center where prostitutes openly line up to work. My heart breaks every time I see the emptiness in their eyes.
•Getting excited when you hear English.
•Having a local restaurant/café where everyone knows who you are.
•Light switches are different. They are flat buttons.
•Spaniards conserve energy. In the metro unless someone is on the escalator and sets off the sensors it stops running. Same thing with lights.
•Letting my clothes air dry because clothes dryers are not common.
•I have not driven in a year and a half. I hope I remember how to get gas.
•Separate checks do not exist in Europe… you are constantly owing somebody money and trying to piece together your money to pay for your meal, café, etc. It’s like a puzzle.
•I have seen this side of the world. I have found it beautiful and charming with its intricacies and secrets to unveil. Yet not even the sites I’ve seen or the places I’ve been can fill my heart and give me purpose like knowing Christ does.
So here I go home! I go home to find yet another new normal. I find that it's okay I'm having to do that.
Onward,
Taryn
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Advice to my 15 year old self
Recently one of my good friends from highschool, Courtney, sent me a DVD of home videos of us from 8th grade through our senior year. Needless to say there was a little bit of everything! There was even some amazing footage of us playing percussion in the Jr. High band. And looking back you realize how glad you are that you made it out of those awkward years. Very awkward years.
There was footage of us talking about Golddusters, the dance squad we were on that took up most of our time throughout highschool. We talked about boys. We talked about life, marriage, food, what other people were doing, and just about anything you can imagine highschool girls talking about. Watching myself in these videos was really comical and interesting at the same time.
Looking back at my 15 year old self I am amazed at what has happened in my life these past 10 years. With that I think I would have some advice to give to myself or some things to tell myself to look forward to. Within these truths I have learned, I can see that they are not things life have taught me. They are things God has shown and revealed to me alone.
Do not delay your obedience. You will suffer the consequences even if you do eventually get around to do what God asked.
You will face trials. Prepare yourself. Your faith will be tried by fire. By the grace of God alone you will come through.
You will see the nations and yearn for their salvation.
You will live around the world. You will love it.
Excuses come fast. Ignore them and how Satan wants to distract from the things God has spoken to you.
Love well. You will encounter many you do not want to love, but you must
As soon as you say you don’t want to do something, God, seemingly and maybe with a little chuckle, will ask you to do just that. Be open at all times to his call. There are blessings in that.
Do not be tempted by the things of this world. Materialism is justified by the American dream and culture. Fight against that.
Responsibility will fall upon you that you do not want. You won’t know what to do unless you seek the Lord. Know he has given this to you expecting you to do great things for his kingdom.
Plunge into the Bible. When Satan attacks those scriptures will come to your mind to revive you.
God will show you things you never would imagine if only you’ll follow him.
You will understand what it means for God's heart and desires to become your own.
There is a seen and unseen war. Fight the good fight begging those around you to respond to the love of Christ.
Do not get weary of doing good.
The world will know you are a follower of Christ by how you love other followers and people who have yet to know of his love.
Thanks be to him for teaching me these lessons over the past ten years. And praise be to him the person he is shaping me to be. Pray that I continue to grow into these things and hold them as truth.
In Him,
Taryn
There was footage of us talking about Golddusters, the dance squad we were on that took up most of our time throughout highschool. We talked about boys. We talked about life, marriage, food, what other people were doing, and just about anything you can imagine highschool girls talking about. Watching myself in these videos was really comical and interesting at the same time.
Looking back at my 15 year old self I am amazed at what has happened in my life these past 10 years. With that I think I would have some advice to give to myself or some things to tell myself to look forward to. Within these truths I have learned, I can see that they are not things life have taught me. They are things God has shown and revealed to me alone.
Do not delay your obedience. You will suffer the consequences even if you do eventually get around to do what God asked.
You will face trials. Prepare yourself. Your faith will be tried by fire. By the grace of God alone you will come through.
You will see the nations and yearn for their salvation.
You will live around the world. You will love it.
Excuses come fast. Ignore them and how Satan wants to distract from the things God has spoken to you.
Love well. You will encounter many you do not want to love, but you must
As soon as you say you don’t want to do something, God, seemingly and maybe with a little chuckle, will ask you to do just that. Be open at all times to his call. There are blessings in that.
Do not be tempted by the things of this world. Materialism is justified by the American dream and culture. Fight against that.
Responsibility will fall upon you that you do not want. You won’t know what to do unless you seek the Lord. Know he has given this to you expecting you to do great things for his kingdom.
Plunge into the Bible. When Satan attacks those scriptures will come to your mind to revive you.
God will show you things you never would imagine if only you’ll follow him.
You will understand what it means for God's heart and desires to become your own.
There is a seen and unseen war. Fight the good fight begging those around you to respond to the love of Christ.
Do not get weary of doing good.
The world will know you are a follower of Christ by how you love other followers and people who have yet to know of his love.
Thanks be to him for teaching me these lessons over the past ten years. And praise be to him the person he is shaping me to be. Pray that I continue to grow into these things and hold them as truth.
In Him,
Taryn
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Counting the Victories
I've hit another wall. The weather is changing and my body is making me fully aware of that. Pain is near and my body feels worn down. On the days when I'm overwhelmed at how I am continually affected by this accident that shook my body, I have to count the victories. It's the only way I can keep my head up when I feel like I am taking steps backwards. These are just a few of the victories, granted by my Father God, I have had since the beginning:
Waking up in a hospital bed and knowing I'd be okay
Learning how to move myself from a hospital bed to a wheelchair.
Forcing myself to eat (initially liquids) so that my body would get strong.
Sharing the Gospel with hospital workers and telling my hospital roommate that I would pray for her.
Talking through a wired jaw.
Talking in Spanish through a wired jaw.
A release from the hospital.
Learning how to bend my knees again.
Learning how to give myself shots for 2 times a day for 2 months. And saying goodbye to the shots and the bruises they left on my body.
Rolling over in my bed with bandaged legs.
Convincing everyone that I still needed the job and Spain and God graciously allowing me to keep it.
Watching bruises fade away from my arms and face and even now watching the final bruises on my legs fade.
Riding home for 18 hours in a medical transport (it was more like being bumped up and down for 18 hours in the back of a cattle truck)without getting sick. Imagine what problems could've caused with a mouth wired shut.
Facing the shock of people's faces who didn't know me and letting it roll off my back. I didn't look so hot for awhile.
Getting my mouth unwired and hearing my voice for the first time in 6 weeks. Seeing the tears of joy in my mother's eyes as she heard my voice for the first time as well.
Two of my best friends, Christy and Kate, visiting me and watching me eat a soft cookie for the very first food I had eaten since the accident (after my mouth was unwired)
Going to Christmas Eve service with my family even though I was exhausted. Crying at the beauty of the song O Come, O Come Emmanuel and feeling humbled that I should get to sing it.
Sitting on the couch Christmas day.Before this I couldn't transfer myself from my wheelchair to any other chairs. My dad had to lift me to the couch.
Sneaking myself and my wheelchair into my bedroom. Later my dad moved my dressers out of the doorway so I could get in and out.
Maneuvering around the kitchen one afternoon unloading the dishwasher to prove to myself that I could do something small and useful.
Using the sink in my bathroom to practice standing before anyone told me I could get out of my wheelchair.
Walking for the first time.
Saying goodbye to the hospital bed/ makeshift hospital room in our house and finally moving into my bedroom.
Learning to walk around the house with a walker.
Learning to walk around the house without the balance of a walker.
Never having to use a cane. I just couldn’t bring myself to allow that to happen.
Learning to walk up and down stairs.
Learning to bounce on a trampoline.
Wearing normal shoes when the swelling went down enough.
The sores on my legs from the swelling healing, finally.
Going to bed without needing to keep the walker by my bedside.
Waking up and being able to take medicine on my own during the night.
Learning to pray for my friends around the world when the pain kept me up at night.
Praying in battle with my mom and dad every night.
Getting rid of that dumb walker.
Sharing my story of God's work with different churches and youth.
Going to therapy 3 times a week for several hours each session. Making my body my slave each time.
Going to the Hispanic ministry at church every Wednesday and Sunday to learn Spanish.
One Sunday telling my mom I didn't want to go to church or to the Spanish service. She told me if I didn't care enough about learning Spanish I should reconsider if I should really be doing the job I was working to go and do. I sat in my bathroom. Pouted and cried. Then told myself to suck it up and rolled out in my little wheelchair to go to church and to learn Spanish. Victory.
Losing tons of my hair and reminding myself it was a good thing God gave me thick hair.
Finishing some training in VA in March. My first big trip on my own in the airport and all.
Walking around Walmart for about 45 minutes.
Driving for the first time.
Being able to sleep on my belly.
Going to the farm with Dad.
Going to Spain only to get stuck because of a volcano in Munich.
Arriving 5 days later in Spain.
Facing the walking and stairs every day in Spain.
Living with cankles and telling myself that they are cute.
Feeling like I lost my personality in the pain and then realizing who I am is in Christ alone.
Crying out to God and Him answering me.
Hearing people pray for me in moments of despair and God lifting the pain in those moments.
In moments when my legs were too tired to go on feeling someone step into my legs and walk for me.
Having the ability to share God loves with my therapists in Spain. I would not have access to them without my injuries.
Accepting that God's victories and how he has used me these past several months has been about him. Not about me.
Learning perseverance.
Learning patience.
Realizing I'm not alone in a battle like this.
Knowing that I can rest in where God has me even though Satan would like me to put more pressure on myself than necessary.
Gaining a platform that is suffering that allows me to speak into people's lives. Somehow we listen better to those who have hurt.
Running and it hurting like you know what. But doing it anyways.
Seeing that God's reign is not limited by any schemes of the devil in which he would have us be discouraged and believe that God has left us.
He who has begun a good work in me will finish it. AMEN!
I know I have so many more victories than this. This list skims over a few that I have seen and remember. Somehow it feels good to reflect on God's faithfulness within each and every victory. However small or large. I fall at the feet of the victorious king I will always worship.
Standing (literally and figuratively) in His Victory,
Taryn
Waking up in a hospital bed and knowing I'd be okay
Learning how to move myself from a hospital bed to a wheelchair.
Forcing myself to eat (initially liquids) so that my body would get strong.
Sharing the Gospel with hospital workers and telling my hospital roommate that I would pray for her.
Talking through a wired jaw.
Talking in Spanish through a wired jaw.
A release from the hospital.
Learning how to bend my knees again.
Learning how to give myself shots for 2 times a day for 2 months. And saying goodbye to the shots and the bruises they left on my body.
Rolling over in my bed with bandaged legs.
Convincing everyone that I still needed the job and Spain and God graciously allowing me to keep it.
Watching bruises fade away from my arms and face and even now watching the final bruises on my legs fade.
Riding home for 18 hours in a medical transport (it was more like being bumped up and down for 18 hours in the back of a cattle truck)without getting sick. Imagine what problems could've caused with a mouth wired shut.
Facing the shock of people's faces who didn't know me and letting it roll off my back. I didn't look so hot for awhile.
Getting my mouth unwired and hearing my voice for the first time in 6 weeks. Seeing the tears of joy in my mother's eyes as she heard my voice for the first time as well.
Two of my best friends, Christy and Kate, visiting me and watching me eat a soft cookie for the very first food I had eaten since the accident (after my mouth was unwired)
Going to Christmas Eve service with my family even though I was exhausted. Crying at the beauty of the song O Come, O Come Emmanuel and feeling humbled that I should get to sing it.
Sitting on the couch Christmas day.Before this I couldn't transfer myself from my wheelchair to any other chairs. My dad had to lift me to the couch.
Sneaking myself and my wheelchair into my bedroom. Later my dad moved my dressers out of the doorway so I could get in and out.
Maneuvering around the kitchen one afternoon unloading the dishwasher to prove to myself that I could do something small and useful.
Using the sink in my bathroom to practice standing before anyone told me I could get out of my wheelchair.
Walking for the first time.
Saying goodbye to the hospital bed/ makeshift hospital room in our house and finally moving into my bedroom.
Learning to walk around the house with a walker.
Learning to walk around the house without the balance of a walker.
Never having to use a cane. I just couldn’t bring myself to allow that to happen.
Learning to walk up and down stairs.
Learning to bounce on a trampoline.
Wearing normal shoes when the swelling went down enough.
The sores on my legs from the swelling healing, finally.
Going to bed without needing to keep the walker by my bedside.
Waking up and being able to take medicine on my own during the night.
Learning to pray for my friends around the world when the pain kept me up at night.
Praying in battle with my mom and dad every night.
Getting rid of that dumb walker.
Sharing my story of God's work with different churches and youth.
Going to therapy 3 times a week for several hours each session. Making my body my slave each time.
Going to the Hispanic ministry at church every Wednesday and Sunday to learn Spanish.
One Sunday telling my mom I didn't want to go to church or to the Spanish service. She told me if I didn't care enough about learning Spanish I should reconsider if I should really be doing the job I was working to go and do. I sat in my bathroom. Pouted and cried. Then told myself to suck it up and rolled out in my little wheelchair to go to church and to learn Spanish. Victory.
Losing tons of my hair and reminding myself it was a good thing God gave me thick hair.
Finishing some training in VA in March. My first big trip on my own in the airport and all.
Walking around Walmart for about 45 minutes.
Driving for the first time.
Being able to sleep on my belly.
Going to the farm with Dad.
Going to Spain only to get stuck because of a volcano in Munich.
Arriving 5 days later in Spain.
Facing the walking and stairs every day in Spain.
Living with cankles and telling myself that they are cute.
Feeling like I lost my personality in the pain and then realizing who I am is in Christ alone.
Crying out to God and Him answering me.
Hearing people pray for me in moments of despair and God lifting the pain in those moments.
In moments when my legs were too tired to go on feeling someone step into my legs and walk for me.
Having the ability to share God loves with my therapists in Spain. I would not have access to them without my injuries.
Accepting that God's victories and how he has used me these past several months has been about him. Not about me.
Learning perseverance.
Learning patience.
Realizing I'm not alone in a battle like this.
Knowing that I can rest in where God has me even though Satan would like me to put more pressure on myself than necessary.
Gaining a platform that is suffering that allows me to speak into people's lives. Somehow we listen better to those who have hurt.
Running and it hurting like you know what. But doing it anyways.
Seeing that God's reign is not limited by any schemes of the devil in which he would have us be discouraged and believe that God has left us.
He who has begun a good work in me will finish it. AMEN!
I know I have so many more victories than this. This list skims over a few that I have seen and remember. Somehow it feels good to reflect on God's faithfulness within each and every victory. However small or large. I fall at the feet of the victorious king I will always worship.
Standing (literally and figuratively) in His Victory,
Taryn
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
August Update
This is No Coincidence
The trip to Germany went well, but was very different from Italy. Immigrants that are in Germany MUST have their legal documents because without them you cannot stay in Germany.
Everything was very orderly as expected, and Brook, Parker, and I felt a little funny blending in with everyone around us. We could’ve easily been German and people would even go up to Brook and speak German to her! We just laughed.
While we were in Stuttgart learning about Spanish speaking churches, we met up with one of Brook’s friends from Arkansas who is working at the International Baptist Church there. Through his group of friends we met a Mexican girl my age who is working and studying in Germany.
We shared what our work was about– finding Latinos, evangelizing them, and then mobilizing them to other immigrant populations. She got it. She’s doing it.
My friend, K, actively shares the Gospel with her Muslim friends and is always looking for ways in which she can tell them about Christ. We had an amazing conversation about her friends and how they have even said she could be from their home countries because of her darker skin color. In some ways they are even culturally similar. Go figure, right?
The beauty of these similarities is that they are comfortable with her. She loves them deeply.
We talked more about her relationships and she shared with me that she was at her wit’s end with sharing with her friends. I got very excited because I told her I have resources in Spanish explaining ways to share the Gospel with Muslims and how to point them to Christ.
After I emailed her these resources she told me that this was the answer she had been waiting for!
What’s even more crazy is that as we were talking and sharing about our life we discovered that we both had been in accidents about 2 years ago that have required intense recovery and continues to affect us..She looked at me in the midst of this and said this is no coincidence! Our meeting each other was not by chance.
I had been praying for God to show me how big he is. He showed me a friend who needed a way to share the Gospel with her friends who badly need to hear it.
God is moving among his people. He is going before us and working in ways we cannot imagine. With our God there aren’t coincidences. We discover that his fingerprints are all over lives.
He Must Be Looking For You
At our hotel in Germany we made friends with the receptionists. They were around our age and had really excellent English. One girl in particular, K, was especially open to us and sought us out to talk with her. So of course we did.
We shared what our job was. We shared about how God has worked in each of our lives. We shared how we’ve seen him work in the lives of others. It was amazing because she listened intently.
One evening Brook and I were able to share in depth about Christ and the things of the Bible with her. She listened. She had questions, so we talked through that.
She told us she had been attending a Bible study at a German church, but she had so many questions. She said whenever she was there she could feel the darkness pulling her away. She has since stopped going.
As she was explaining this, I felt the urge to tell her how much God loves her. I said, “You know how much he loves you? He loves you so much, K! He loves you enough to send us here to talk to you about him. He must be
looking for you since we are here having this conversation right now.”
Her crystal blue eyes lit up and a sweet smile changed her entire countenance. “Yeah?” she asked. Then she told us that she is waiting to hear from him. We told her we’d pray for her to hear from him in a powerful way. We encouraged her to read the Bible because we know he talks to us through his Word.
Please pray for my friend. Pray that God speaks to her so clearly and that she receives the message of his love and salvation. Pray that she reads the Bible and especially that the spiritual darkness will stay away from her. She reminds me how we only see a portion of the battle that wages. Her soul is at stake, We must intercede for her!
Prayer Requests
For the Trailblazer team– preparation for France– September 18-30
My legs-swelling to be minimal/ for my tendon to not be painful
For my friends who help me at therapy
For the people (believers and non believers )we met in Germany
Praises!
My continued improvement
The good relationships made on the Germany trip
I only have a month and a half left in Spain before I’ll be home!
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