One day during training, one of my friends came up to me and said, "How many are you hoping for?" Considering I had no clue what he was talking about, my thoughts went to pets, children, and many more random things. Puzzled, I looked at him as he clarified, "I mean how many people are you hoping become believers while you're overseas?"
His question just about knocked me over. I hadn't even really thought about how many people I wanted to come to know Christ during my time overseas. I know in general as people we love to brag about numbers. If every Latin American in Europe became a Christian in the next two years that I'm there, I would be so excited, but counting numbers before this question hadn't really occurred to me. Something else I hadn't thought too hard about was that Spain is an open country where people can be any religion they want. The persecution doesn't exist for becoming a Christian, so that's not the hurdle to jump over with this people group I'll be working with. However, where my friend is now is a closed country. It can be dangerous to become a Christian. You can lose everything if you become a Christian, and people seriously count the costs to become a believer where he is. Now, maybe you have a little more insight into the question he was really asking me.
He looked at me again and said, "I'm really hoping for just one come to know Christ." Just one! I was a little shocked by his answer, but I knew that it very well might be a correct estimate. Now, he can correct me if I'm wrong, but I know that he considers just one person worth his entire 2 years as a Journeyman. I think though, what if I signed up for my job, and they guaranteed that just one person would come to know the Lord during my 2 years overseas. I would do it, but that's a hard thought to swallow. I know that in my friend's heart, he desires to see so many more come to know our Lord, but he recognizes the mountains before him in the country where he's now living. He knew a few months ago when he asked me that question that to see just one person come to faith would be an awesome thing to behold.
Ever since that day I've been praying for that "just one" for my friend. Despite the work that I'll be doing among Latin Americans in Europe I can't get out of my head the "just one." The "just one" that lives in a country where being a Christian could one day mean losing his or her life. Please pray for the "just one." Pray that my friend has success in sharing the freedom we have in Jesus Christ. Pray that hearts are changed despite where people live in the world and what it will cost them to follow the Lord. Pray for people all over the world who are in these countries where the Christians are few, and the gospel is hard to come by. Lift up my friend, and the work he'll be doing. Ask the Lord to allow him to see more than "just one" come to Christ.
I believe in an awesome God who works in the most difficult places on this earth. Thank you to my friends around the world that are going to the difficult places. I love you dearly and you are in my prayers.
Taryn
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Ignored
In the midst of my recovery, I have been everything but ignored by people. Upon my arrival home, my parents moved me into our sunroom that had been transformed into a wheel chair friendly bedroom for me by some sweet women from church. Also since my wreck I have received more emails, cards, text messages, and phone calls than I can even count. Now when you think of these instances, the word ignored probably doesn't come to your mind. Since my wreck I would say I have been everything but ignored by the people in my life. People have been so great to let me know they are praying for me, thinking of me, and that they love me. The word ignored just doesn't quite come to mind during this season of my life. Well, you just haven't met my dog yet...
For those of you that know my dog, Cinnamon, you might know where I'm going with this. First let me introduce Cinnamon to you. She's my 11 year old weenie dog that thinks she's something special. In her old age she's starting to smell like an old dog (I'll let you imagine what all that entails). She also has her own schedule, and if someone messes it up, she'll let you know she's irritated. I begged for her when I was in 7th grade. Considering that in the Blocker household pets do not belong inside, she is quite the anomaly as our inside dog of 11 blissful years.
Ever since I arrived home that early Saturday (the 12th) morning after our 18 hour drive, my dog has completely ignored me. Considering that the dog's only interests are sleeping, fuzzy blankets, and food I'm not that surprised, but come on! She didn't really know what to think about the wheel chair or about me taking over the sunroom. The sunroom is, as part of her schedule, her door to the outside where she lays on the deck. In the midst of this confusion she did, however, know what plan of action she was going to take towards me. Her plan of action was plain and simple; it was to ignore me. It's amazing how she'll see me coming in my wheel chair, and she refuses to move out of my way. It's like I'm playing the game chicken with my dog! You know, the game where two people moving towards each other keep going until one person "chickens out" and moves, so they don't collide. Well if we were playing this game we would collide with one another. This scenario, I must share, is exactly what happened yesterday. My mom was pushing me in the wheel chair, the dog was sitting in the middle of the rug in our living room, and her little foot got ran over. All I can say is that now she can't afford to ignore the wheel chair; she moves when she sees it coming.
Now, I've had this dog now for 11 years. We've been through ups and downs, and we've been through my awkward junior high years and even my recent days of gaining employment. We've been through those horrible times of the doggy potty training years, and of course the times when the dog just gets sick and throws up somewhere. Through these instances I'm the one that would get in trouble, not the dog! You would think our history would be enough for her to pity me, but it's not. She just ignores me in every way she can (except when the wheel chair is moving). It's unbelievable that I've been prayed for by strangers, but my own dog could care less about my health status!
Despite the lack of care by my dog, I continue to be overwhelmed by the prayers and encouragement of everyone. One thing that I have forgotten to share is about my employment. I am blessed beyond anything that I am still employed by the IMB, and I'll still get to go to Spain. Please pray for healing by March 8-11. These are the dates that I need to go back and finish some training before I can go to Spain. Yesterday was my original date of departure. It's hard when I think about how drastically my plans have changed. All I can do is continue to lean on God, and thank Him for the way He protected my body from anything permanent and how He continues to heal me. I am blessed.
Also, yesterday was a very hard day for me in that my energy had left me completely. There must have been a lot of you guys praying for me yesterday and last night (my dear friends around the globe) because today my energy is back up. Please continue to pray for my appetite and energy. I have to eat good to have energy, and I need my energy so I can STAND AND WALK! I'm so ready to get out of the wheel chair. I am humbled by it daily, but I'm ready to get going again.
I love you all, and thank you for interceding for me especially when I my energy is so low that all I can seem to pray is, "help!" God hears you, and our Father continues to heal me.
In Him who is always good,
Taryn
Oh, and if you think of my dog, I guess you can pray for her. I'm not too big of a fan of praying for animals, but the dog needs a heart change!
For those of you that know my dog, Cinnamon, you might know where I'm going with this. First let me introduce Cinnamon to you. She's my 11 year old weenie dog that thinks she's something special. In her old age she's starting to smell like an old dog (I'll let you imagine what all that entails). She also has her own schedule, and if someone messes it up, she'll let you know she's irritated. I begged for her when I was in 7th grade. Considering that in the Blocker household pets do not belong inside, she is quite the anomaly as our inside dog of 11 blissful years.
Ever since I arrived home that early Saturday (the 12th) morning after our 18 hour drive, my dog has completely ignored me. Considering that the dog's only interests are sleeping, fuzzy blankets, and food I'm not that surprised, but come on! She didn't really know what to think about the wheel chair or about me taking over the sunroom. The sunroom is, as part of her schedule, her door to the outside where she lays on the deck. In the midst of this confusion she did, however, know what plan of action she was going to take towards me. Her plan of action was plain and simple; it was to ignore me. It's amazing how she'll see me coming in my wheel chair, and she refuses to move out of my way. It's like I'm playing the game chicken with my dog! You know, the game where two people moving towards each other keep going until one person "chickens out" and moves, so they don't collide. Well if we were playing this game we would collide with one another. This scenario, I must share, is exactly what happened yesterday. My mom was pushing me in the wheel chair, the dog was sitting in the middle of the rug in our living room, and her little foot got ran over. All I can say is that now she can't afford to ignore the wheel chair; she moves when she sees it coming.
Now, I've had this dog now for 11 years. We've been through ups and downs, and we've been through my awkward junior high years and even my recent days of gaining employment. We've been through those horrible times of the doggy potty training years, and of course the times when the dog just gets sick and throws up somewhere. Through these instances I'm the one that would get in trouble, not the dog! You would think our history would be enough for her to pity me, but it's not. She just ignores me in every way she can (except when the wheel chair is moving). It's unbelievable that I've been prayed for by strangers, but my own dog could care less about my health status!
Despite the lack of care by my dog, I continue to be overwhelmed by the prayers and encouragement of everyone. One thing that I have forgotten to share is about my employment. I am blessed beyond anything that I am still employed by the IMB, and I'll still get to go to Spain. Please pray for healing by March 8-11. These are the dates that I need to go back and finish some training before I can go to Spain. Yesterday was my original date of departure. It's hard when I think about how drastically my plans have changed. All I can do is continue to lean on God, and thank Him for the way He protected my body from anything permanent and how He continues to heal me. I am blessed.
Also, yesterday was a very hard day for me in that my energy had left me completely. There must have been a lot of you guys praying for me yesterday and last night (my dear friends around the globe) because today my energy is back up. Please continue to pray for my appetite and energy. I have to eat good to have energy, and I need my energy so I can STAND AND WALK! I'm so ready to get out of the wheel chair. I am humbled by it daily, but I'm ready to get going again.
I love you all, and thank you for interceding for me especially when I my energy is so low that all I can seem to pray is, "help!" God hears you, and our Father continues to heal me.
In Him who is always good,
Taryn
Oh, and if you think of my dog, I guess you can pray for her. I'm not too big of a fan of praying for animals, but the dog needs a heart change!
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Did I Sign Up For This?
I have some good news about my progress! When I went to the Dr. Monday, he said my legs are healing nicely and hopefully in two weeks I can start putting some pressure on them! This will eventually lead me to start walking sometime in January. Also tomorrow my jaw will be unwired, and that will greatly increase the type of things I can eat! Even though I still can't chew, it will just be nice to be free and nice to not be limited to liquids. My neck had been bothering me a lot at night, and on my discharge from the hospital in Virginia there was something said about a fracture in my neck. We asked about it here and finally found out that it's nothing dangerous, and it heals fine within 4-6 weeks. It's feeling a lot better now. The swelling and bruising in my legs and mouth are slowly going down, so it's nice to see some progress. Another thing that's nice is I don't have as much pain overall. Your prayers are truly lifting me up to our Father, and He is healing me each day.
Before my wreck while I was at training, we had been going through the book of Acts. We studied how churches started and who all was involved in these church plants. When we got to Acts 9 I quickly recognize it as the passage about Paul's conversion. Paul had been known for his persecution of Christians, and on his way to Damascus he encountered Jesus. Now this is one of those encounters that you don't just walk away from unchanged. Paul was blind and he went on his way into Damascus very much a changed man. Later a Christian man, Ananias, was commanded by God to go to the place where Paul was staying. Ananias, knowing Paul's reputation very well, responded to God with a concern about this information he knew. God then said to Ananias, "Go! This man is my chosen instrument to carry my name before the Gentiles and their kings and before the people of Israel. I will show him how much he must suffer for my name." (Acts 9:15-16)
For some reason I couldn't get past the last sentence God spoke. Suffering for his name? What does that even mean? These words have kept running through my mind and continue to do so in the midst of what I'm going through now. I realize I'm not necessarily undergoing persecution, but what does it really mean to suffer for the name of Jesus Christ? It made me wonder how I would feel if God said this about me to someone. Then I thought did I even sign up for this suffering? Did I sign up for the type of suffering that Paul underwent when he became so radical for the gospel? The Lord has quickly reminded me that yes I have. Jesus is very clear with people about the cost of following Him. Have we forgotten that he requires everything of us?
As believers we lose our lives to the Lord (not necessarily death). This means putting everything else as secondary to what the Lord would have us do and to loving Him first. When I see suffering in that passage, I really wrestle with it because I'm not exactly sure what all it means. I have come to a peace however knowing that I serve an awesome God who loves me beyond what I can understand. I also know that He is continually stretching me, building character, and making me stronger in Him. Many times this requires suffering, but what is the end goal? The end goal is more people knowing about Jesus Christ. This was what God was requiring of Paul so he could proclaim the gospel. Since I've decided that I did sign up for suffering for Jesus' name, I will do just that because His name is valued beyond everything else.
I'm not sure if I clearly explained all my thoughts in this, and maybe that's because it's something I don't have the exact answer to. I challenge you to think about it though. What did God mean by this? Why did God require this of Paul? What does he require of us?
Thank you all for all you have done and keep doing for me. I still have a ways to go, but I am encouraged knowing your prayers carry me along.
Taryn
Also... please let me know how I can be praying for you guys! I mean I'm in a wheel chair not doing too much. Not that I really have a ton of energy still, but I can certainly pray for you.
Before my wreck while I was at training, we had been going through the book of Acts. We studied how churches started and who all was involved in these church plants. When we got to Acts 9 I quickly recognize it as the passage about Paul's conversion. Paul had been known for his persecution of Christians, and on his way to Damascus he encountered Jesus. Now this is one of those encounters that you don't just walk away from unchanged. Paul was blind and he went on his way into Damascus very much a changed man. Later a Christian man, Ananias, was commanded by God to go to the place where Paul was staying. Ananias, knowing Paul's reputation very well, responded to God with a concern about this information he knew. God then said to Ananias, "Go! This man is my chosen instrument to carry my name before the Gentiles and their kings and before the people of Israel. I will show him how much he must suffer for my name." (Acts 9:15-16)
For some reason I couldn't get past the last sentence God spoke. Suffering for his name? What does that even mean? These words have kept running through my mind and continue to do so in the midst of what I'm going through now. I realize I'm not necessarily undergoing persecution, but what does it really mean to suffer for the name of Jesus Christ? It made me wonder how I would feel if God said this about me to someone. Then I thought did I even sign up for this suffering? Did I sign up for the type of suffering that Paul underwent when he became so radical for the gospel? The Lord has quickly reminded me that yes I have. Jesus is very clear with people about the cost of following Him. Have we forgotten that he requires everything of us?
As believers we lose our lives to the Lord (not necessarily death). This means putting everything else as secondary to what the Lord would have us do and to loving Him first. When I see suffering in that passage, I really wrestle with it because I'm not exactly sure what all it means. I have come to a peace however knowing that I serve an awesome God who loves me beyond what I can understand. I also know that He is continually stretching me, building character, and making me stronger in Him. Many times this requires suffering, but what is the end goal? The end goal is more people knowing about Jesus Christ. This was what God was requiring of Paul so he could proclaim the gospel. Since I've decided that I did sign up for suffering for Jesus' name, I will do just that because His name is valued beyond everything else.
I'm not sure if I clearly explained all my thoughts in this, and maybe that's because it's something I don't have the exact answer to. I challenge you to think about it though. What did God mean by this? Why did God require this of Paul? What does he require of us?
Thank you all for all you have done and keep doing for me. I still have a ways to go, but I am encouraged knowing your prayers carry me along.
Taryn
Also... please let me know how I can be praying for you guys! I mean I'm in a wheel chair not doing too much. Not that I really have a ton of energy still, but I can certainly pray for you.
Friday, December 18, 2009
Laugh So You Don't Cry
I can't even believe that this Sunday is has been a month since the wreck. It's strange to still have injuries that have to heal, but God has been faithful. Some good news is that my tailbone stopped hurting a little over a week ago, and this coming Wednesday we are unwiring my jaws (YAY), but still no chewing. Also my dad spoke with my orthopedic doctor here, and he said that my legs are looking great. He also said that I'll be able to start putting pressure on them... which means I'm a step (literally) closer to walking again! I went to the eye doctor the other day too, and he said everything with my vision is good. Such blessings to know that my body is healing as it should. Please specifically pray that my teeth remain healthy since it's difficult to clean them. I just really hope that nothing has compromised my mouth's health.
This entire event in my life has been very difficult at times for all of us, but God has been good in that He gives us humor in the midst of it all. My mom keeps saying that we sometimes just laugh so we don't cry. And it's so true. I thought because of this I would share some of the funny things that have happened. I'll also share some blessings that we experienced and those moments that are just special. (Warning- some of these things I have no memory of)
-As I was being placed on the helicopter to be taken to the hospital, I felt the need to try to hug everyone that was helping (my love language is physical touch, and an instance where I don't remember this at all)
-Mom has asked me to lick my lips before when food got on my mouth, and I sweetly reminded her that my mouth is wired shut and that means my tongue can't get out either.
-I have to give myself 2 shots a day, and I passed that responsibility onto my mom. The first shot she gave me, she did quickly and correctly. Afterwards she said, "That was my first time to give someone a shot." We laughed.
-The entire point of having my mom give me shots was so I would no longer anticipate it. I had to start reminding my mom to not count aloud (even if it was a whisper). I told her how it defeated the goal of not anticipating the shot. We laughed.
-While I was at training, all of the children were all of the sudden extremely interested in me. Many of the parents would tell me I made it to their children's' night time prayers each night. How special is that?
-One day I had to use the restroom, so afterwards I flushed the toilet. Only problem was that this toilet was known for how the handle sticks, thus leading to an overflow. As I saw this happening I yelled for my mom saying, "GET ME OUT!" (I mean I'm in a wheel chair!) Mom didn't appreciate my concern for myself, and she ended up having to clean up the water that did overflowed everywhere. We laughed.
-Many times during meals people would ask what I'd like to eat... once again I remind them that my mouth is wired shut.
-I love right before bedtime when my parents pray over me. It's almost like I'm a child all over again.
- It's strange how much I have in common with senior citizens and newborns: liquids only, potty chair (oh the fun), limited talking, tons of medicine, parents checking me in the middle of the night, a hospital bed, large amounts of sleep, wheel chair (which has been compared to a stroller), in one day seeing 3 doctors. That does it for now.
-For the first time in my life my legs are thin. For all you women out there, you know how this feels like a miracle. I'll take it despite the trauma that I had to go through to achieve this (only because I didn't have the choice).
-At my commissioning I felt like a rock star in a funny way. All these people I didn't know were coming up to me asking me how I was and telling me they had been praying. A blessing, and also I just felt popular for a little bit. I mean how many times do you encounter a crowd who knows who you are? That's what I'm saying... rock star status.
-While looking at new pictures one day I just started laughing and my mom asked why. I then went on to explain that it struck me funny to look at a picture and realize that I'm in a wheelchair. We laughed... you just had to be there.
-Also at my commissioning the president and vice president of the IMB came up to me and told me they had been praying. Now I would NEVER do this, but since they already said they had been praying I gave them my prayer cards. Just keeping my name circulating with the big dogs! (just kidding)
-I have been given so many prayer scarves. It blesses me to know that there have been several people who don't even know me that have prayed over me while making these.
-I have been informed that I've made it onto several churches' prayer lists. I say tell more people so they can pray!
-When you go through something like this, it's overwhelming how many people support you and pray for you. I know that people literally all over the world are praying for me. That in and of itself means everything. How awesome to be lifted up by all of you. I am truly thankful.
Even though it's been a month I love how you guys are still faithful to think of me and lift me up to our Father. Please let me know how y'all are. Even if I don't know you and you've stumbled upon my blog say hello! I would love to hear from you.
In Him who carries us in our weakest times,
Taryn
This entire event in my life has been very difficult at times for all of us, but God has been good in that He gives us humor in the midst of it all. My mom keeps saying that we sometimes just laugh so we don't cry. And it's so true. I thought because of this I would share some of the funny things that have happened. I'll also share some blessings that we experienced and those moments that are just special. (Warning- some of these things I have no memory of)
-As I was being placed on the helicopter to be taken to the hospital, I felt the need to try to hug everyone that was helping (my love language is physical touch, and an instance where I don't remember this at all)
-Mom has asked me to lick my lips before when food got on my mouth, and I sweetly reminded her that my mouth is wired shut and that means my tongue can't get out either.
-I have to give myself 2 shots a day, and I passed that responsibility onto my mom. The first shot she gave me, she did quickly and correctly. Afterwards she said, "That was my first time to give someone a shot." We laughed.
-The entire point of having my mom give me shots was so I would no longer anticipate it. I had to start reminding my mom to not count aloud (even if it was a whisper). I told her how it defeated the goal of not anticipating the shot. We laughed.
-While I was at training, all of the children were all of the sudden extremely interested in me. Many of the parents would tell me I made it to their children's' night time prayers each night. How special is that?
-One day I had to use the restroom, so afterwards I flushed the toilet. Only problem was that this toilet was known for how the handle sticks, thus leading to an overflow. As I saw this happening I yelled for my mom saying, "GET ME OUT!" (I mean I'm in a wheel chair!) Mom didn't appreciate my concern for myself, and she ended up having to clean up the water that did overflowed everywhere. We laughed.
-Many times during meals people would ask what I'd like to eat... once again I remind them that my mouth is wired shut.
-I love right before bedtime when my parents pray over me. It's almost like I'm a child all over again.
- It's strange how much I have in common with senior citizens and newborns: liquids only, potty chair (oh the fun), limited talking, tons of medicine, parents checking me in the middle of the night, a hospital bed, large amounts of sleep, wheel chair (which has been compared to a stroller), in one day seeing 3 doctors. That does it for now.
-For the first time in my life my legs are thin. For all you women out there, you know how this feels like a miracle. I'll take it despite the trauma that I had to go through to achieve this (only because I didn't have the choice).
-At my commissioning I felt like a rock star in a funny way. All these people I didn't know were coming up to me asking me how I was and telling me they had been praying. A blessing, and also I just felt popular for a little bit. I mean how many times do you encounter a crowd who knows who you are? That's what I'm saying... rock star status.
-While looking at new pictures one day I just started laughing and my mom asked why. I then went on to explain that it struck me funny to look at a picture and realize that I'm in a wheelchair. We laughed... you just had to be there.
-Also at my commissioning the president and vice president of the IMB came up to me and told me they had been praying. Now I would NEVER do this, but since they already said they had been praying I gave them my prayer cards. Just keeping my name circulating with the big dogs! (just kidding)
-I have been given so many prayer scarves. It blesses me to know that there have been several people who don't even know me that have prayed over me while making these.
-I have been informed that I've made it onto several churches' prayer lists. I say tell more people so they can pray!
-When you go through something like this, it's overwhelming how many people support you and pray for you. I know that people literally all over the world are praying for me. That in and of itself means everything. How awesome to be lifted up by all of you. I am truly thankful.
Even though it's been a month I love how you guys are still faithful to think of me and lift me up to our Father. Please let me know how y'all are. Even if I don't know you and you've stumbled upon my blog say hello! I would love to hear from you.
In Him who carries us in our weakest times,
Taryn
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
A Belated Thanksgiving
Most of you know that since the car wreck was on November 22nd I pretty much missed Thanksgiving. My parents joked that if I wanted to spend the holiday with them so badly, I should have just asked instead of forcing them to come be with me in the hospital because of the wreck. Thanksgiving was a blur to me, because I was still on heavy medications and let's be honest... hospitals aren't exactly festive! Little did I know that the Lord would allow me to experience Thanksgiving a little later than expected.
One night about a week ago, before we were home, I woke up in the middle of the night remembering that I still couldn't walk and realizing that my legs were hurting. It's a deep pain since it's bones we're dealing with here, and I just almost started to complain to myself. As I was about to justifiably (in my mind) complain, God reminded me of people all around the world. He then reminded me of how blessed I am that I am receiving the medical care that I have. Think about all we have. I had access to surgery, to a hospital to recover, to medicines, to doctors, to nurses, and to nutrition ( I won't say food just yet, since my mouth is still wired shut!), and so much more. Other places in the world if this happened, people may be crippled for the rest of their life, or a person wouldn't have the necessary care to even live. I was so ashamed of how much I had overlooked in how God has provided for me. As Americans we are too quick to assume that life here is the norm when in fact we live very blessed lives in comparison with the rest of the world. That night the Lord allowed me to have a belated Thanksgiving.
One more thing that I want to clarify is the work of the Holy Spirit in my life right now. I know so many people have applauded my ability to stay positive in the midst of everything. It is so important for me to let you know that it is the Holy Spirit alone working through me that I am at peace with everything. God is so faithful to never give us more than we can handle, and I believe in these severe instances the Holy Spirit carries us through it. I just want to always turn the glory to God because this is His story, and if His name isn't glorified in this, then I have not done what I'm supposed to as a believer in Jesus Christ. This has nothing to do with me. It is my prayer that God continues to use me.
When I left the hospital an ambulance took me to the training center I had been at previously. In the back with me was a woman a few years older than me. As I was talking to her, I was able to encourage her and tell her of God's faithfulness. She said that she really needed to hear that and recently she had really been struggling in her faith. She thanked me, and I told her I'd pray for her. The thought occurred to me the other day that this was a divine appointment. Then the other thought I had was what if all of this struggle was for this one divine appointment? Was encouraging this person worth all that I had been through? My first response was couldn't all of this reproduced something so much larger than just touching one person's life? Then God gently reminded me that this woman is absolutely, 100% worth all that I've been through just so I could remind her of how much her Creator loves her. It humbled me greatly and let me remember how much our Lord loves us. I've since then decided that if she's worth it to my Master, then she's completely worth all of this to me. Now I don't know if encouraging her is the reason for all of this, and I know God can use this for anything he wants, I just needed to make sure my heart was in the right place.
I am blessed beyond words when I hear of people I've never met that are praying for me. It also blesses me to know I have friends around the globe lifting me up. Each one of you have touched my heart in such an intimate way. Know that your prayers keep me encouraged, and your prayers keep me focused on the Lord throughout this all. Please pray for quick healing of my jaw, so that it doesn't have to stay shut! Also pray for my legs to heal in a mighty way. The sooner I'm walking the better :) My heart aches for the gospel to spread among people in Europe, and I want to be there as fast as I can helping with that work.
Let me know any of your prayer request and know how much I love you guys!
Taryn
One night about a week ago, before we were home, I woke up in the middle of the night remembering that I still couldn't walk and realizing that my legs were hurting. It's a deep pain since it's bones we're dealing with here, and I just almost started to complain to myself. As I was about to justifiably (in my mind) complain, God reminded me of people all around the world. He then reminded me of how blessed I am that I am receiving the medical care that I have. Think about all we have. I had access to surgery, to a hospital to recover, to medicines, to doctors, to nurses, and to nutrition ( I won't say food just yet, since my mouth is still wired shut!), and so much more. Other places in the world if this happened, people may be crippled for the rest of their life, or a person wouldn't have the necessary care to even live. I was so ashamed of how much I had overlooked in how God has provided for me. As Americans we are too quick to assume that life here is the norm when in fact we live very blessed lives in comparison with the rest of the world. That night the Lord allowed me to have a belated Thanksgiving.
One more thing that I want to clarify is the work of the Holy Spirit in my life right now. I know so many people have applauded my ability to stay positive in the midst of everything. It is so important for me to let you know that it is the Holy Spirit alone working through me that I am at peace with everything. God is so faithful to never give us more than we can handle, and I believe in these severe instances the Holy Spirit carries us through it. I just want to always turn the glory to God because this is His story, and if His name isn't glorified in this, then I have not done what I'm supposed to as a believer in Jesus Christ. This has nothing to do with me. It is my prayer that God continues to use me.
When I left the hospital an ambulance took me to the training center I had been at previously. In the back with me was a woman a few years older than me. As I was talking to her, I was able to encourage her and tell her of God's faithfulness. She said that she really needed to hear that and recently she had really been struggling in her faith. She thanked me, and I told her I'd pray for her. The thought occurred to me the other day that this was a divine appointment. Then the other thought I had was what if all of this struggle was for this one divine appointment? Was encouraging this person worth all that I had been through? My first response was couldn't all of this reproduced something so much larger than just touching one person's life? Then God gently reminded me that this woman is absolutely, 100% worth all that I've been through just so I could remind her of how much her Creator loves her. It humbled me greatly and let me remember how much our Lord loves us. I've since then decided that if she's worth it to my Master, then she's completely worth all of this to me. Now I don't know if encouraging her is the reason for all of this, and I know God can use this for anything he wants, I just needed to make sure my heart was in the right place.
I am blessed beyond words when I hear of people I've never met that are praying for me. It also blesses me to know I have friends around the globe lifting me up. Each one of you have touched my heart in such an intimate way. Know that your prayers keep me encouraged, and your prayers keep me focused on the Lord throughout this all. Please pray for quick healing of my jaw, so that it doesn't have to stay shut! Also pray for my legs to heal in a mighty way. The sooner I'm walking the better :) My heart aches for the gospel to spread among people in Europe, and I want to be there as fast as I can helping with that work.
Let me know any of your prayer request and know how much I love you guys!
Taryn
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
It's Always Been Stained with Blood
Probably a little over a week ago when I left the hospital and we got me settled into our living quarters at my training center, it struck me that I hadn't seen my Bible in awhile. Now usually I try to be in the Word every day, but in the midst of sleeping, medicines, blurred vision, and pain I hadn't been able to read. It concerned me that I hadn't seen my Bible because I love this purple thinline NIV Bible I have. I've had it since my freshman year of college, and it's been through alot with me. It's even been the Bible I've slept with on those nights when I really needed to feel God's presence with me... what a better way to be with God than with His Word. I wasn't sure where it was because I knew it had been on the car wreck with me.
After asking about my Bible my mom told me that we did have it, and she gave it to me. I immediately noticed something different about it. My Bible was stained on the edges and on the inside with blood from the wreck. For whatever reason this caught me off guard as I began to cry. I guess because I can't remember the wreck it hasn't emotionally affected me a ton, but at this moment the seriousness of it all hit me. As I was tearing up my mom gave me some words of wisdom. She said, "You know I was thinking about how this Bible has blood on it, but if you think about it, it's always been stained with blood." How beautiful is that? Jesus' blood has always covered the Bible and has always covered us when we trust in Him. It gave me a new perspective on my now blood stained purple thinline NIV Bible. It's a good reminder to know that abundant life that we are promised costs everything, but God saw that the price was paid in full and with Jesus' blood.
As of now I'm doing well. My spirits are still high, and I know that's by God alone that I'm at peace. I do have times where my legs hurt or where it's a weird feeling that I can't walk right now, but our Lord is faithful. The bruises on my arm and face are fading, and my eye is looking alot better considering at one time you couldn't see the white of my eye. My mouth will be shut for 2 more weeks, so pray that I can continue to eat enough. I have dreams at night where I'm walking, then I wake up and am like... wait a second!
Please pray for safe travel since we'll be going home this weekend. I'm still going to be commissioned this Thursday WOOO WOOO! I'm so excited and overjoyed that this is just a bump in the road! God is victorious always. Please continue to pray for my family and for me. We are doing well, but I want to continue to give God glory even on the hard days. Pray for my pain, and pray that all of my paperwork to go to Spain works out okay. Right before my wreck I applied for my visa, so we are hoping my visa comes later instead of sooner so I don't have to start the process over again.
Thanks to everyone for the encouragement, the texts, the emails, the facebook messages, and so much more. Sorry I can't respond to them all, but know you have lifted me up to the Lord in such a strong way. I love to hear from you guys and hopefully I'll be in better communication now that I'm getting stronger. I'm even starting to look more like myself again! I'm so thankful that none of this is permanent... I'm truly blessed.
Love you all!
Taryn
After asking about my Bible my mom told me that we did have it, and she gave it to me. I immediately noticed something different about it. My Bible was stained on the edges and on the inside with blood from the wreck. For whatever reason this caught me off guard as I began to cry. I guess because I can't remember the wreck it hasn't emotionally affected me a ton, but at this moment the seriousness of it all hit me. As I was tearing up my mom gave me some words of wisdom. She said, "You know I was thinking about how this Bible has blood on it, but if you think about it, it's always been stained with blood." How beautiful is that? Jesus' blood has always covered the Bible and has always covered us when we trust in Him. It gave me a new perspective on my now blood stained purple thinline NIV Bible. It's a good reminder to know that abundant life that we are promised costs everything, but God saw that the price was paid in full and with Jesus' blood.
As of now I'm doing well. My spirits are still high, and I know that's by God alone that I'm at peace. I do have times where my legs hurt or where it's a weird feeling that I can't walk right now, but our Lord is faithful. The bruises on my arm and face are fading, and my eye is looking alot better considering at one time you couldn't see the white of my eye. My mouth will be shut for 2 more weeks, so pray that I can continue to eat enough. I have dreams at night where I'm walking, then I wake up and am like... wait a second!
Please pray for safe travel since we'll be going home this weekend. I'm still going to be commissioned this Thursday WOOO WOOO! I'm so excited and overjoyed that this is just a bump in the road! God is victorious always. Please continue to pray for my family and for me. We are doing well, but I want to continue to give God glory even on the hard days. Pray for my pain, and pray that all of my paperwork to go to Spain works out okay. Right before my wreck I applied for my visa, so we are hoping my visa comes later instead of sooner so I don't have to start the process over again.
Thanks to everyone for the encouragement, the texts, the emails, the facebook messages, and so much more. Sorry I can't respond to them all, but know you have lifted me up to the Lord in such a strong way. I love to hear from you guys and hopefully I'll be in better communication now that I'm getting stronger. I'm even starting to look more like myself again! I'm so thankful that none of this is permanent... I'm truly blessed.
Love you all!
Taryn
Friday, December 4, 2009
The In Between
Sorry I haven't blogged in a long time. As many of you know I was in a bad car wreck November 22nd. The 30th I was released from the hospital. Right now I am at the place where I had been training, and my mom is here taking care of me. My injuries include 2 broken legs, a broken tail bone, and a broken jaw (quite difficult to talk and eat!, my eating consists of liquids). Please pray for the healing of my body. We aren't sure yet what this means as far as my going overseas, but we are waiting patiently on the Lord.
As far as the wreck goes, I am very blessed because I don't remember anything. I don't even remember the car starting to swerve. A man accidentally came over into our lane, and my team member Brook turned so we wouldn't get hit. We then hit several trees and the car was totalled. Brook is doing okay, she has a broken wrist and glass in her arm. It's been a little bit harder for her as far as remembering because while she was awake, I wasn't responding to her. A pretty scary feeling. We were then both airlifted to different hospitals, but it took them awhile to figure out who I was. My parents were contacted and then drove with Brook's mom to Virginia. They weren't able to fly for various reasons, but got here as fast as they could.
My first day or two in the hospital were a blur, but I know God was protecting me from the pain. Whenever you go through something like this people automatically want to know if you are angry or upset with God. The truth is that I'm not at all angry or upset with him. Who am I to question what God allows? Who am I to question his timeline? I have quickly started to realize that in our faith there is NO IN BETWEEN. I either trust God completely, or I don't trust him at all. I would challenge you to consider this. Do I trust him even though my body is broken and all of my plans have changed? For me the only option is to continue on in trust. I will not curse my heavenly Father, and I will not doubt him. Sometimes I may question it and not understand, but I will not turn away from him. His ways are so much bigger than ours. What will it take for us to know that? I know that the evil one would love no more than to see us defeated as Christians or to see us angry at God for our circumstances. I know this is a lie, and I choose to believe that God's name will be exalted higher than before because of this. For those of you that know me, you know that I was in a bad car accident also when I was 17. This is interesting because this wreck happened right before I went on my first mission trip. My wreck now has happened right before I am supposed to do international missions for 2 years. Satan does not want God's name to be proclaimed, but we will continue to proclaim it anyways!
I pray that God's name is lifted up on my lips and on yours. Please consider the in between. If you think you are in the in between, maybe you should think again. I strongly believe there isn't an in between. It's all or nothing.
Your prayers mean so much to me, more than you know. All of the emails and messages are so special to me. Sorry if I don't get back to you because of the volume in which I've received them, and because I haven't been on the computer. Keep praying that the Holy Spirit strengthens my family and me. We need it right now in this storm. I'm so thankful that God's always in control though.
Love you guys,
Taryn
As far as the wreck goes, I am very blessed because I don't remember anything. I don't even remember the car starting to swerve. A man accidentally came over into our lane, and my team member Brook turned so we wouldn't get hit. We then hit several trees and the car was totalled. Brook is doing okay, she has a broken wrist and glass in her arm. It's been a little bit harder for her as far as remembering because while she was awake, I wasn't responding to her. A pretty scary feeling. We were then both airlifted to different hospitals, but it took them awhile to figure out who I was. My parents were contacted and then drove with Brook's mom to Virginia. They weren't able to fly for various reasons, but got here as fast as they could.
My first day or two in the hospital were a blur, but I know God was protecting me from the pain. Whenever you go through something like this people automatically want to know if you are angry or upset with God. The truth is that I'm not at all angry or upset with him. Who am I to question what God allows? Who am I to question his timeline? I have quickly started to realize that in our faith there is NO IN BETWEEN. I either trust God completely, or I don't trust him at all. I would challenge you to consider this. Do I trust him even though my body is broken and all of my plans have changed? For me the only option is to continue on in trust. I will not curse my heavenly Father, and I will not doubt him. Sometimes I may question it and not understand, but I will not turn away from him. His ways are so much bigger than ours. What will it take for us to know that? I know that the evil one would love no more than to see us defeated as Christians or to see us angry at God for our circumstances. I know this is a lie, and I choose to believe that God's name will be exalted higher than before because of this. For those of you that know me, you know that I was in a bad car accident also when I was 17. This is interesting because this wreck happened right before I went on my first mission trip. My wreck now has happened right before I am supposed to do international missions for 2 years. Satan does not want God's name to be proclaimed, but we will continue to proclaim it anyways!
I pray that God's name is lifted up on my lips and on yours. Please consider the in between. If you think you are in the in between, maybe you should think again. I strongly believe there isn't an in between. It's all or nothing.
Your prayers mean so much to me, more than you know. All of the emails and messages are so special to me. Sorry if I don't get back to you because of the volume in which I've received them, and because I haven't been on the computer. Keep praying that the Holy Spirit strengthens my family and me. We need it right now in this storm. I'm so thankful that God's always in control though.
Love you guys,
Taryn
Thursday, November 19, 2009
I LIVED!
This past week we have had our security training, and I am happy to inform that I lived! Were there moments that I questioned my survival... absolutely. Were there times of fear... sure. I know that some of you who have gone through the training can vouch for what I'm saying and may share some of the same feelings that I have. After the training I became more and more thankful that this security prepartion given to me. It makes me realize how much our lives our valued and how to always represent Christ, no matter our "security" situation.
It's interesting when we look in the Bible and see how many times there are "security threats." I know that no one has seen those words in the Bible, but Paul might describe parts of his life as being in a security threat situation. Jesus Christ was also brought forth on unjust trials where he knew how to answer correctly despite the slander against his name. Thanks for the prayers for this training, and thanks for your giving to Lottie Moon that allows for this training to be paid for and given to me. I know I'm thankful for it (as I'm sure are my parents!).
Please keep me in your prayers as I leave tomorrow at 3 a.m. (yes, 3 a.m.) to fly to Houston to apply for my visa with my friend Meredith. Pray for sleep on the airplane and an easy application processs. Also please keep in your prayers that Brook's paperwork would come so she can go and apply for her visa. You guys are a blessing.
Taryn
It's interesting when we look in the Bible and see how many times there are "security threats." I know that no one has seen those words in the Bible, but Paul might describe parts of his life as being in a security threat situation. Jesus Christ was also brought forth on unjust trials where he knew how to answer correctly despite the slander against his name. Thanks for the prayers for this training, and thanks for your giving to Lottie Moon that allows for this training to be paid for and given to me. I know I'm thankful for it (as I'm sure are my parents!).
Please keep me in your prayers as I leave tomorrow at 3 a.m. (yes, 3 a.m.) to fly to Houston to apply for my visa with my friend Meredith. Pray for sleep on the airplane and an easy application processs. Also please keep in your prayers that Brook's paperwork would come so she can go and apply for her visa. You guys are a blessing.
Taryn
Sunday, November 15, 2009
The Prayer of a Child
A few weeks ago during our Sunday night cultural worship people gathered around and prayed for those going to work with American peoples around the globe. This was such a special time for people to hold my hand and pray over me and the work that God is doing around the globe. During the prayer as peoples' hands were placed on my arms and shoulders, I felt a little hand on the small of my back. By estimating the placement and size of the hand I determined that it must be a child, and throughout the prayer the child squirmed and moved about.
At the end of this prayer I was overcome with the blessing of being prayed for. It's such an intimate thing when people surround you in prayer and intercede to the Lord for you. Another time I felt this blessing was when I was in the Amazon and people prayed over my call to missions. I finally looked down to discover who the squirming culprit was, and it was a little boy. He looked up at me with such a serious face and grabbed onto my leg and gave me the biggest hug. My heart of course melted and maybe I even teared up a little. I was reminded of God's word when he tells us to have faith like a child. I was blessed because I could tell by the look on his face that he had been praying for me in that moment. How beautiful is it to have a faithful child to intercede for me? How amazing is it that God creates all of us big and little to desire to come before him and make our request known?
Later on I told the little boy's mother of the event, and she smiled and assured me that he will keep on praying for me because he's such a prayer warrior. One day in their house church he prayed boldly for all of the people in the city where he's going to know the name of the Lord, even in the time frame of one day! Do I pray like this? Do I intercede for others with the faith and power that the Lord has given us? I hope I do (and pray I do)!
Please keep praying for me because I need you guys to! The evil one hates us, and he hates what I'm going to go do. Pray that the Lord will give me the grace and faith to trust him in all things. Pray that the Lord is making pathways in Spain right now, so that others may know the powerful name of Jesus and so that they may believe.
I always love hearing from you guys. Let me know how I can pray for you.
Taryn
At the end of this prayer I was overcome with the blessing of being prayed for. It's such an intimate thing when people surround you in prayer and intercede to the Lord for you. Another time I felt this blessing was when I was in the Amazon and people prayed over my call to missions. I finally looked down to discover who the squirming culprit was, and it was a little boy. He looked up at me with such a serious face and grabbed onto my leg and gave me the biggest hug. My heart of course melted and maybe I even teared up a little. I was reminded of God's word when he tells us to have faith like a child. I was blessed because I could tell by the look on his face that he had been praying for me in that moment. How beautiful is it to have a faithful child to intercede for me? How amazing is it that God creates all of us big and little to desire to come before him and make our request known?
Later on I told the little boy's mother of the event, and she smiled and assured me that he will keep on praying for me because he's such a prayer warrior. One day in their house church he prayed boldly for all of the people in the city where he's going to know the name of the Lord, even in the time frame of one day! Do I pray like this? Do I intercede for others with the faith and power that the Lord has given us? I hope I do (and pray I do)!
Please keep praying for me because I need you guys to! The evil one hates us, and he hates what I'm going to go do. Pray that the Lord will give me the grace and faith to trust him in all things. Pray that the Lord is making pathways in Spain right now, so that others may know the powerful name of Jesus and so that they may believe.
I always love hearing from you guys. Let me know how I can pray for you.
Taryn
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Why Do You Speak Our Language?
I have been sitting in class a lot lately... and by a lot I mean that I feel like I'm back in grade school without a recess break. I'm not complaining, because I feel so blessed to have this opportunity to learn so much, but let's be honest; some things make it in and some things don't!
There have been a few things recently that have made it into my mind, and I can't get them out. The other day we were watching a video of some missionaries about my age in Africa. These women worked alongside the Africans during the day, dressed like them, ate as they did, and lived as they did, grass hut and all. They laughed as they joked about mosquitoes (which we all know isn't quite a laughing matter if you've even had malaria), and their tired countenance showed the manual work that they had been doing. They were worn down physically, but a light still shined in their eyes.
Now when these girls first arrived at this village, one of their main goals was to learn the language of the people there, or their heart language. This made such an impact on the villagers that they asked these girls "why do you speak our language?" Now Americans can be notorious for being arrogant about language learning (even in the stereotypical sense) especially in situations overseas, so this question from the Africans didn't come as a shock to me. The response of the missionaries did however shock me even though it shouldn't have. One of the girls very quickly responded, "Because Jesus speaks your language."
How many times do we Americanize the gospel or think it should be understood only in English? How many times do we forget that God created all languages therefore he knows them and desires for the nations to know his Word. This is one of the most beautiful messages of the gospel. God sent his son for the world because he loves the world. If we go to such great lengths to proclaim the gospel in peoples' mother language, then why don't we utilize the language we already know and proclaim it to other English speakers. It can be difficult, but we must recognize that nationals are able to share the gospel with nationals the best. That includes us in America. We speak the same language as everyone around us (just about), so we can best communicate with those around us.
I am reminded daily while at training that the harvest is plenty but the workers are few. It's challenging, but it's necessary. I'm not even asking you to learn another language (even though I think it would be useful for anyone). I'm just encouraging us to use what we already know to impact others. Until we face a language barrier, we don't realize what a gift communication is, and what a gift it is that we a serve a God who can understand us no matter who we are or what language we speak.
You guys are great, and I appreciate the prayers. I'll try to update more! Things just go by so quickly here. Please be praying about Lottie Moon Christmas offerings. This is the lifeblood of the IMB and crucial to sending people around the world to say Jesus' name in other languages!
Love everyone so much!
Taryn
There have been a few things recently that have made it into my mind, and I can't get them out. The other day we were watching a video of some missionaries about my age in Africa. These women worked alongside the Africans during the day, dressed like them, ate as they did, and lived as they did, grass hut and all. They laughed as they joked about mosquitoes (which we all know isn't quite a laughing matter if you've even had malaria), and their tired countenance showed the manual work that they had been doing. They were worn down physically, but a light still shined in their eyes.
Now when these girls first arrived at this village, one of their main goals was to learn the language of the people there, or their heart language. This made such an impact on the villagers that they asked these girls "why do you speak our language?" Now Americans can be notorious for being arrogant about language learning (even in the stereotypical sense) especially in situations overseas, so this question from the Africans didn't come as a shock to me. The response of the missionaries did however shock me even though it shouldn't have. One of the girls very quickly responded, "Because Jesus speaks your language."
How many times do we Americanize the gospel or think it should be understood only in English? How many times do we forget that God created all languages therefore he knows them and desires for the nations to know his Word. This is one of the most beautiful messages of the gospel. God sent his son for the world because he loves the world. If we go to such great lengths to proclaim the gospel in peoples' mother language, then why don't we utilize the language we already know and proclaim it to other English speakers. It can be difficult, but we must recognize that nationals are able to share the gospel with nationals the best. That includes us in America. We speak the same language as everyone around us (just about), so we can best communicate with those around us.
I am reminded daily while at training that the harvest is plenty but the workers are few. It's challenging, but it's necessary. I'm not even asking you to learn another language (even though I think it would be useful for anyone). I'm just encouraging us to use what we already know to impact others. Until we face a language barrier, we don't realize what a gift communication is, and what a gift it is that we a serve a God who can understand us no matter who we are or what language we speak.
You guys are great, and I appreciate the prayers. I'll try to update more! Things just go by so quickly here. Please be praying about Lottie Moon Christmas offerings. This is the lifeblood of the IMB and crucial to sending people around the world to say Jesus' name in other languages!
Love everyone so much!
Taryn
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Isn't This Simple?
During my time at training, we have been assigned to groups that we meet with on a regular basis. These groups consist of 10-15 individuals. This is also the group I meet with for church. Many places around the world this is what a house church looks like. Especially in areas where the gospel is not supposed to be preached, people MUST meet secretly to study God's word. Oh and did I mention, there's not a designated building?
I have always loved church, and I have grown up in church. I love my church home, and I miss it when I'm away. That being said I will add that I have also been so blessed by this house church experience. There are people of all ages in it, and some house churches have multiple children (which from what I hear makes a very interesting Sunday morning!) House church has been refreshing and a place where I feel like I can be transparent with other believers. How many of us feel that way at our home churches that are filled with hundreds of people? I know that this is the reason for Sunday school classes, Bible studies, and cell groups, but have we overcomplicated church?
There is such a beauty and showing up each week alternating who's leading and allowing for the Spirit to move. Sometimes it's a more emotional day for some, and sometimes people have been led to share. I feel like we take this liberty away from ourselves when we go to church and don't allow ourselves to be seen as we are. I know there have been times where I have chosen to not be transparent and vulnerable. Sometimes it's because I don't want to be. The simplicity of house church through all of these aspects has opened my heart to realizing the areas where I need to work on being a stronger part of the body of Christ. It also challenges me that as I go into the world, it is not necessary for me to model to new believers that they must have an order of worship each Sunday. In some parts of the world these house churches meet daily, working together as a family and as the body of Christ.
I know this is a very different concept from what we experience in the States, but it's an interesting thing to follow throughout the New Testament. It has been an amazing experience, and I feel blessed to be with those in this little church that we make up. Simple worship of our Father. No matter where we worship it has to be about him, but like I said, isn't this simple? I hope everyone at some point gets to have an experience like this.
I am traveling to Houston the 20th of November for my visa application. Please pray that it goes well. Also check out my team's blog. The link on the left side should say Spain Prayer Update. One of the couple's arrived in Madrid today, so please pray that they settle down easily!
Y'all are such an encouragement!
Taryn
I have always loved church, and I have grown up in church. I love my church home, and I miss it when I'm away. That being said I will add that I have also been so blessed by this house church experience. There are people of all ages in it, and some house churches have multiple children (which from what I hear makes a very interesting Sunday morning!) House church has been refreshing and a place where I feel like I can be transparent with other believers. How many of us feel that way at our home churches that are filled with hundreds of people? I know that this is the reason for Sunday school classes, Bible studies, and cell groups, but have we overcomplicated church?
There is such a beauty and showing up each week alternating who's leading and allowing for the Spirit to move. Sometimes it's a more emotional day for some, and sometimes people have been led to share. I feel like we take this liberty away from ourselves when we go to church and don't allow ourselves to be seen as we are. I know there have been times where I have chosen to not be transparent and vulnerable. Sometimes it's because I don't want to be. The simplicity of house church through all of these aspects has opened my heart to realizing the areas where I need to work on being a stronger part of the body of Christ. It also challenges me that as I go into the world, it is not necessary for me to model to new believers that they must have an order of worship each Sunday. In some parts of the world these house churches meet daily, working together as a family and as the body of Christ.
I know this is a very different concept from what we experience in the States, but it's an interesting thing to follow throughout the New Testament. It has been an amazing experience, and I feel blessed to be with those in this little church that we make up. Simple worship of our Father. No matter where we worship it has to be about him, but like I said, isn't this simple? I hope everyone at some point gets to have an experience like this.
I am traveling to Houston the 20th of November for my visa application. Please pray that it goes well. Also check out my team's blog. The link on the left side should say Spain Prayer Update. One of the couple's arrived in Madrid today, so please pray that they settle down easily!
Y'all are such an encouragement!
Taryn
Saturday, October 31, 2009
You Try Packing Your Stuff In a Coffin!
Fact: I can only take 3 suitcases with me for the next 2 years.
Fact: Early missionaries used to pack their belongings in their coffins... because they weren't coming back.
Conclusion: All things considered, I think I can handle my situation fairly well!
It's amazing to look at the paths that have been made before me, and it's amazing that I get to be a part of making some of these pathways. Lately, I have been reminded the importance of not complaining (even in the midst of visa drama!). What am I really giving up? What am I really sacrificing? When I look back to those who have led the way I am challenged. Would I be willing to pack all I need in my coffin for the sake of following God? What is my commitment to the Gospel being spread around the globe? I am reminded over and over again that "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses my life for my sake will find it." Matthew 10:39. Am I losing my life for the sake of Christ? I really weigh this out daily. I weigh out the depth of that statement, and if I'm willing to follow in suffering. I can say that those who have lost their lives, even if it's not a physical death, assure me it's worth it. I look forward to daily losing my life for the Lord, because His word tells me that in him I'll find it. What a blessing that is!
Do you want to lose your life? What are you holding on to? My prayer is that we all lose ourselves for the sake of the Word of God. I pray that no matter what this is my first priority (don't worry, I've already told my parents this!). As of now I'm going to a secure location where my life isn't endangered for a specific reason such as sharing the Gospel. What if one day God leads me to a place where I could be in danger? Will I go? Please pray I will because I never want to be outside of the guidance of the Spirit. I know people may start reading this thinking I've lost my mind. I am here to let you know that I probably have! (sometimes I wonder because what I say is what's challenging my heart). All of this is for the advancement of the Kingdom. Once you hear and see about the work around the globe it's impossible to not hunger for people to know the truth. My heart has been given to this, and I just can't fight it. The nations deserve to hear. God loves them enough to send people out.
Training has been great, but a lot of sitting and listening. Pray for alert ears and open hearts. Pray for my teammate Brook. She's still waiting for the necessary documents from Spain to apply for her visa. Pray for an easy visa application process for myself and another girl going to Spain, Meredith. Continue to pray for my team that's already in Spain. They are on my heart daily and please lift them up as well. I'm always excited to hear from you. Any prayer requests let me know or email me.
Love you all!
Taryn
Fact: Early missionaries used to pack their belongings in their coffins... because they weren't coming back.
Conclusion: All things considered, I think I can handle my situation fairly well!
It's amazing to look at the paths that have been made before me, and it's amazing that I get to be a part of making some of these pathways. Lately, I have been reminded the importance of not complaining (even in the midst of visa drama!). What am I really giving up? What am I really sacrificing? When I look back to those who have led the way I am challenged. Would I be willing to pack all I need in my coffin for the sake of following God? What is my commitment to the Gospel being spread around the globe? I am reminded over and over again that "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses my life for my sake will find it." Matthew 10:39. Am I losing my life for the sake of Christ? I really weigh this out daily. I weigh out the depth of that statement, and if I'm willing to follow in suffering. I can say that those who have lost their lives, even if it's not a physical death, assure me it's worth it. I look forward to daily losing my life for the Lord, because His word tells me that in him I'll find it. What a blessing that is!
Do you want to lose your life? What are you holding on to? My prayer is that we all lose ourselves for the sake of the Word of God. I pray that no matter what this is my first priority (don't worry, I've already told my parents this!). As of now I'm going to a secure location where my life isn't endangered for a specific reason such as sharing the Gospel. What if one day God leads me to a place where I could be in danger? Will I go? Please pray I will because I never want to be outside of the guidance of the Spirit. I know people may start reading this thinking I've lost my mind. I am here to let you know that I probably have! (sometimes I wonder because what I say is what's challenging my heart). All of this is for the advancement of the Kingdom. Once you hear and see about the work around the globe it's impossible to not hunger for people to know the truth. My heart has been given to this, and I just can't fight it. The nations deserve to hear. God loves them enough to send people out.
Training has been great, but a lot of sitting and listening. Pray for alert ears and open hearts. Pray for my teammate Brook. She's still waiting for the necessary documents from Spain to apply for her visa. Pray for an easy visa application process for myself and another girl going to Spain, Meredith. Continue to pray for my team that's already in Spain. They are on my heart daily and please lift them up as well. I'm always excited to hear from you. Any prayer requests let me know or email me.
Love you all!
Taryn
Monday, October 26, 2009
Christianity, Religion of Imprisonment?
Some people try to argue that Christianity is a religion that imprisons people to a certain way of thinking. Some people also say that Christianity is just a list of dos and don'ts that are legalistic and have no heart behind them. Some people when they think of Christianity they think of a loss of freedom. Without the right knowledge, a lot of these things would appear to be correct.
The good news is... these things are incorrect and proven wrong over and over again by lives full of freedom and abundance in the name of Jesus Christ. Have you ever felt so guilty and oppressed by something you've done wrong? Have you ever had a sleepless night where you wonder if there's any freedom from a dark feeling you have? I know I have, and it's no fun. There's also no physical way for me to find freedom from this feeling.
The good news again... I have found a freedom in Christ that is indescribable and isn't just a made up feeling to cover up the real pain. I don't think you can just think away or mask pain like that. I do believe that God is the great comforter that knows that the burden of sin and wrong we experience is too much for us. We can't handle it. Thus the restless nights, and yucky gut feeling when things aren't right. I'm not saying that things are perfect when you are a Christian, but there is a peace and a deep understanding that we do not carry the burden alone.
By our belief in Christ he takes away our sins. Now, I wish that this means we could forget everything we've done wrong, but sometimes we can't quite shake every memory this side of heaven. The great news is that God's word promises that when we repent he forgives us. Romans 8:1 Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Now that refreshing to my spirit! So many times I run to this passage and am reminded of the grace that I'm undeserving of. This leads to the next question of why does the Christian life demand so much? I think one thing to consider is that the commands God gives us is not to hurt us. His commands are meant to keep us out of the sin that entangles and keeps us awake at night with a restless spirit. Freedom from this is more than I can comprehend, but I'm blessed to experience it. So are we really talking about Christian imprisonment here?
Ask those around the globe who believe in Christ and are murdered, ostracised, and persecuted for their faith. Do they think it's worth it? Do they feel freedom? They claim that it is worth it, and they do feel freedom. When you think of paying that kind of price for your faith, it makes it seem pretty easy for us to believe here in the comfort of our U.S. lives. What freedom are you in desire of? Freedom to do whatever you want or freedom to rest in an indescribable peace only through Christ?
Please pray for Brook's visa information from Spain. For some reason it didn't make it, so the process is slightly delayed. Love to you all!
Love, Taryn
The good news is... these things are incorrect and proven wrong over and over again by lives full of freedom and abundance in the name of Jesus Christ. Have you ever felt so guilty and oppressed by something you've done wrong? Have you ever had a sleepless night where you wonder if there's any freedom from a dark feeling you have? I know I have, and it's no fun. There's also no physical way for me to find freedom from this feeling.
The good news again... I have found a freedom in Christ that is indescribable and isn't just a made up feeling to cover up the real pain. I don't think you can just think away or mask pain like that. I do believe that God is the great comforter that knows that the burden of sin and wrong we experience is too much for us. We can't handle it. Thus the restless nights, and yucky gut feeling when things aren't right. I'm not saying that things are perfect when you are a Christian, but there is a peace and a deep understanding that we do not carry the burden alone.
By our belief in Christ he takes away our sins. Now, I wish that this means we could forget everything we've done wrong, but sometimes we can't quite shake every memory this side of heaven. The great news is that God's word promises that when we repent he forgives us. Romans 8:1 Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Now that refreshing to my spirit! So many times I run to this passage and am reminded of the grace that I'm undeserving of. This leads to the next question of why does the Christian life demand so much? I think one thing to consider is that the commands God gives us is not to hurt us. His commands are meant to keep us out of the sin that entangles and keeps us awake at night with a restless spirit. Freedom from this is more than I can comprehend, but I'm blessed to experience it. So are we really talking about Christian imprisonment here?
Ask those around the globe who believe in Christ and are murdered, ostracised, and persecuted for their faith. Do they think it's worth it? Do they feel freedom? They claim that it is worth it, and they do feel freedom. When you think of paying that kind of price for your faith, it makes it seem pretty easy for us to believe here in the comfort of our U.S. lives. What freedom are you in desire of? Freedom to do whatever you want or freedom to rest in an indescribable peace only through Christ?
Please pray for Brook's visa information from Spain. For some reason it didn't make it, so the process is slightly delayed. Love to you all!
Love, Taryn
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Why Aren't There More Faces On the Map?
The other evening here at training, we had a mapping ceremony. This ceremony consisted of all of us standing up placing our faces on a map to show where we are going and sharing prayer requests. In the midst of these prayers and people standing up with their children, I was so moved by the commitment being made by these saints. People are going with infants, multiple children, and children with special needs. Needless to say it was pretty loud for most of the time because of the presence of these little ones. Through the noise I was quickly reminded of the sacrifice that these people are willing to make. I was also reminded of the sacrifice many other people are willing to make, but they don't have the opportunity to go because of finances.
As the ceremony ended I looked at the map and realized how empty the map looked. I thought why aren't there more faces on the map? I think there's a lot of reasons for this, but ultimately I believe the issue is when people are willing to go and funds don't exist we have a problem. How frustrating is it that people are willing to pick up their lives, more elsewhere, make the sacrifice, but they can't go because a sacrifice isn't being made by the church to send them? I'm not frustrated with anyone, but I am frustrated with myself because I am part of the body of believers. I'm frustrated that I haven't been a sacrificial giver, and I never realized it until these past few months. When have I ever gone with out grabbing a Starbucks coffee, eating out, or clothing whenever I wanted it? The answer to that is never. Sacrificial giving isn't giving out of our excess. It's giving that we can feel, and it affects us. That's why it's called sacrificial. It means that we have to rely on God for our needs instead of our bank account.
I don't want anyone to take this as a stab at the church. Because of you and many others there are over 5,000 people overseas now with the IMB, and I am HONORED to be one of them. I do hope it is taken as a challenge, because there are more people that want to go. Let's send them! This is such a challenge for me. It's a necessary challenge, because if I'm a Christian who believes the gospel is the most important thing in the world, then it should revolutionize my life. It should also revolutionize my bank account, because it's an essential investment. I hope I am revolutionized for the good news.
Love you all!
Taryn
Just FYI I love reading the comments!
As the ceremony ended I looked at the map and realized how empty the map looked. I thought why aren't there more faces on the map? I think there's a lot of reasons for this, but ultimately I believe the issue is when people are willing to go and funds don't exist we have a problem. How frustrating is it that people are willing to pick up their lives, more elsewhere, make the sacrifice, but they can't go because a sacrifice isn't being made by the church to send them? I'm not frustrated with anyone, but I am frustrated with myself because I am part of the body of believers. I'm frustrated that I haven't been a sacrificial giver, and I never realized it until these past few months. When have I ever gone with out grabbing a Starbucks coffee, eating out, or clothing whenever I wanted it? The answer to that is never. Sacrificial giving isn't giving out of our excess. It's giving that we can feel, and it affects us. That's why it's called sacrificial. It means that we have to rely on God for our needs instead of our bank account.
I don't want anyone to take this as a stab at the church. Because of you and many others there are over 5,000 people overseas now with the IMB, and I am HONORED to be one of them. I do hope it is taken as a challenge, because there are more people that want to go. Let's send them! This is such a challenge for me. It's a necessary challenge, because if I'm a Christian who believes the gospel is the most important thing in the world, then it should revolutionize my life. It should also revolutionize my bank account, because it's an essential investment. I hope I am revolutionized for the good news.
Love you all!
Taryn
Just FYI I love reading the comments!
Friday, October 16, 2009
Fingerprints of God
This last year when I was at the Kanakuk Institute one of our speakers encouraged us to journal about the times in our life where we really feel and see God moving. He said to name the journal the fingerprints of God, and we could use it for reference in time of doubt, fear, or worry. I haven't started this journal just yet, but the more and more I experience God the more I realize the necessity it is for us to remember what God does for us. Many times in the Old Testament the works that the Lord had performed were the things that Israel held dear, because those were the times when they could feel him the most. I truly believe we are the same way. I have rich and dry seasons where God is always with me, but I definitely feel him more at different times. I would love to share just a few fingerprints of God's in my life right now.
So, I have to take medicine every day. It's not for anything to serious, but if I don't take it... well, let's just say I feel very sick! This medicine also happens to be very expensive. For me to pay for it while on the field would constantly make a dent in my expenses, and it would be a struggle to pay for it. But, my mom told me today that for certain this drug is going generic! It will go generic in November, and I leave for the field in December. I've been taking this medicine for 5 years, and I truly believe that God knew my needs. He knew I would need this drug to be cheaper before I left the country! Some people may say, oh that insignificant, or oh that coincidence. The God I believe in isn't a God of coincidence. He's intentional and he's personal. He's so intentional and personal that he knew the importance of saving me over $100 a month. This is the God I serve.
Another moment happened today. We were given a spiritual retreat time of 3 hours. If any of you know me, that's a LONG TIME for me to be without contact or without talking to people. Usually when I approach God, I just talk a lot. For me this is a struggle because too often I approach our Father and the King of Kings in such a way that doesn't reflect my reverence for him. So I gave listening a shot, and I decided to try it first instead. I went to my room, sat on my bed and I sat there and sat there and eventually fell asleep. I woke up about 45 minutes later not realizing I had fallen asleep praying (or listening). I was disappointed in my inability to do a simple task of listening. I looked at my phone to look at the time. I saw that I had received a text message from one of my best friends. This friend I am certain is always praying for me, and shares a heart for missions. She has been a constant support and encouragement to me also. All her text said was "Tblocke... how can i be praying for u?" Despite the fact that I can't stay awake and pray for myself, or listen to God, God placed me on my friend's heart. God spoke to her and let her know the importance of interceding for me. How special is that? How extraordinary is that? Once again, some people may say that it's a coincidence, but the God I believe in is THAT intentional and THAT personal.
All of your prayers mean more to me than you know!
Love y'all,
Taryn
So, I have to take medicine every day. It's not for anything to serious, but if I don't take it... well, let's just say I feel very sick! This medicine also happens to be very expensive. For me to pay for it while on the field would constantly make a dent in my expenses, and it would be a struggle to pay for it. But, my mom told me today that for certain this drug is going generic! It will go generic in November, and I leave for the field in December. I've been taking this medicine for 5 years, and I truly believe that God knew my needs. He knew I would need this drug to be cheaper before I left the country! Some people may say, oh that insignificant, or oh that coincidence. The God I believe in isn't a God of coincidence. He's intentional and he's personal. He's so intentional and personal that he knew the importance of saving me over $100 a month. This is the God I serve.
Another moment happened today. We were given a spiritual retreat time of 3 hours. If any of you know me, that's a LONG TIME for me to be without contact or without talking to people. Usually when I approach God, I just talk a lot. For me this is a struggle because too often I approach our Father and the King of Kings in such a way that doesn't reflect my reverence for him. So I gave listening a shot, and I decided to try it first instead. I went to my room, sat on my bed and I sat there and sat there and eventually fell asleep. I woke up about 45 minutes later not realizing I had fallen asleep praying (or listening). I was disappointed in my inability to do a simple task of listening. I looked at my phone to look at the time. I saw that I had received a text message from one of my best friends. This friend I am certain is always praying for me, and shares a heart for missions. She has been a constant support and encouragement to me also. All her text said was "Tblocke... how can i be praying for u?" Despite the fact that I can't stay awake and pray for myself, or listen to God, God placed me on my friend's heart. God spoke to her and let her know the importance of interceding for me. How special is that? How extraordinary is that? Once again, some people may say that it's a coincidence, but the God I believe in is THAT intentional and THAT personal.
All of your prayers mean more to me than you know!
Love y'all,
Taryn
Thursday, October 15, 2009
An Extraordinary Call for an Ordinary Person
I arrived at my training just a few days ago, and I'm already overwhelmed by how the Lord chooses people to go and serve him. He chooses the weak, the broken hearted, the strong, the weary, the confident, and so on. He chooses all of believers to be a part of his plan. Today I was quickly reminded of how I lack a lot of humility in sharing the gospel at times. The most precious gift we have, and I either don't count it "worthy" enough to share, or I'm scared or intimidated. Other times I present it without grace and with an attitude that doesn't want anything to do with the person who disagrees. This may be an interesting thing to read by someone who has been hired to share the good news, but I'm just being honest. Why do we hesitate? What are we afraid of? Why do we become defensive and aloof? Something I heard that has impacted me is a saying that it is a sin to know where water is in the desert and not tell others. This is exactly like life. There are people around me dying of a thirst for the Lord, they don't even realize it, and I fail at telling them where the water/life source is. I fail at seeing the urgency and sharing the absolute truth with them. I had a fascinating encounter on the airplane with a peer. He had grown up in church his entire life, but wasn't quite ready to say that Jesus is the only way. These are the people I want to love, no matter where I am in the world. These are the people who I should care about and pray for always. It's everyone around me. You don't have to move to another country to share God's love and grace with a person. If truth is absolute, and we know it, let's be bold. Let's be honest. Let's be loving. Let's realize that the Holy Spirit is at work, and it's our responsibility to share. It's not our job to convince or talk someone into belief in Christ. We just have to present the information, and then it's up to them. I love that the Lord is working on people's hearts all of the time. I love that the Lord uses people like me who is unworthy of this call. It truly is extraordinary that God uses the ordinary people to share his word for it to resonate around the globe.
In Him,
Taryn
In Him,
Taryn
Friday, October 9, 2009
Just Call Me the Birthday Girl!
Another birthday... and I'm still always so excited. I kind of felt like I was 10 or so when I woke up this morning. I mean come on, shouldn't I be more mature, and not as into birthdays? Not at all. I was excited about the birthday gifts and of course the cake (with whipped frosting of course! the cake place spelled my name wrong, so we had to take care of that) Thanks for the birthday wishes from everyone, and for the recent prayer and support. As of now my important documents necessary for my Spain visa application are on their way to me. This is a huge answer to prayer, especially because this part of the process took too long. Pray for the rest of my team and that their documents come also. Brook is the girl that I'll be living with, traveling with, and breathing the same air with for the next 2 years, and she hasn't got her documents yet. Please pray for her as well! I leave for training in Virginia Tuesday and I'm so excited! Something funny that happened is that my dad and I have the same flight next Tuesday. He's having to travel for business and randomly his company sent him his itinerary with the same flight as mine! I know he's thrilled to travel a part of the trip with me. Funny how those things happen. Please comment and let me know that you guys are reading this. Your support means everything to me. Hopefully I'll have fun and exciting stories soon, and I'll keep y'all updated through my training. I pray that I learn the information I need to effectively share the gospel, and to share truth with Latin American immigrants. Love to you all!
Saturday, October 3, 2009
A little intro
Even though most of the people that will be following this know me, I thought maybe it would be a good idea to introduce myself to some of the people that don't know me. So here it is:
Hello, I am so excited about the call that God has placed on my life for international missions! It is an exciting time for me, and I pray that I use it to bring glory to God’s name. I am a graduate of the University of Arkansas. This past May I received my master’s degree in Youth and Family Ministry through a partnership with John Brown University and the Kanakuk Institute. My hope in acquiring this degree is a biblical preparation for ministry.
My call to missions began when I was seventeen. I had a constant tug on my heart to figure out what I was going to do with my life. God was so faithful to place international missions on my heart, even though I wasn’t sure what that would look like, and the fact that I had not been out of the country yet! The same year I felt a call to missions (my junior year of high school) my mother and I went on our first mission trip to an Indian reservation, Pine Ridge, South Dakota. My eyes were opened to the need here in the U.S., and my heart was opened even more to the world that I had yet to experience. From then on I have been pursuing missions as a lifetime commitment.
At this time I have made a 2 year commitment to missions. I will be in Spain working with Latin American immigrants. The initial goal is to discover where these Latin American immigrants are residing throughout Europe and then to see whether or not the gospel has reached them. It is estimated that 3-4% of Europe’s population consists of these immigrants. One of the encouraging things to know is that Latin Americans are one of the most responsive people groups to the gospel!
This is a basic bio I've been using to introduce myself, so hopefully it was informative! I hope that this blog is a great way for people to stay updated with me, pray for my team and for myself, and ways for everybody to go along with me in my journey!
As of now please pray for the team that is already in Spain. They are trying to figure out their long term living arrangements, and just getting the groundwork started for the job to be done! Also pray for myself and other team members that are stateside because we are working on getting our visas. Let me tell you... it's quite a process! As time goes on I know you all will hear more about these individuals that I'm working with, so please always be praying for them.
Until later,
Taryn
Hello, I am so excited about the call that God has placed on my life for international missions! It is an exciting time for me, and I pray that I use it to bring glory to God’s name. I am a graduate of the University of Arkansas. This past May I received my master’s degree in Youth and Family Ministry through a partnership with John Brown University and the Kanakuk Institute. My hope in acquiring this degree is a biblical preparation for ministry.
My call to missions began when I was seventeen. I had a constant tug on my heart to figure out what I was going to do with my life. God was so faithful to place international missions on my heart, even though I wasn’t sure what that would look like, and the fact that I had not been out of the country yet! The same year I felt a call to missions (my junior year of high school) my mother and I went on our first mission trip to an Indian reservation, Pine Ridge, South Dakota. My eyes were opened to the need here in the U.S., and my heart was opened even more to the world that I had yet to experience. From then on I have been pursuing missions as a lifetime commitment.
At this time I have made a 2 year commitment to missions. I will be in Spain working with Latin American immigrants. The initial goal is to discover where these Latin American immigrants are residing throughout Europe and then to see whether or not the gospel has reached them. It is estimated that 3-4% of Europe’s population consists of these immigrants. One of the encouraging things to know is that Latin Americans are one of the most responsive people groups to the gospel!
This is a basic bio I've been using to introduce myself, so hopefully it was informative! I hope that this blog is a great way for people to stay updated with me, pray for my team and for myself, and ways for everybody to go along with me in my journey!
As of now please pray for the team that is already in Spain. They are trying to figure out their long term living arrangements, and just getting the groundwork started for the job to be done! Also pray for myself and other team members that are stateside because we are working on getting our visas. Let me tell you... it's quite a process! As time goes on I know you all will hear more about these individuals that I'm working with, so please always be praying for them.
Until later,
Taryn
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